dear porky,

first of all, i'd like you to know that what you have gone through is nothing but tragic and sad, i'm sorry to read about it.

i could try and give you advice like get informed, write about it and get help but that's probably something that's being said to you a thousand times by far more trustworthy people than myself.

what i can do is tell you two things, the first being that sometimes shit happens in my life, sometimes it's big shit sometimes not so much, and on a number of those occasions i feel really angry and frustrated; of those times when i feel like that, there's some that i just so happen to log into this very board to check my rep point (har har har) and, after a couple of posts, i start feeling better, for some unknown reason (ok, you lot are funny and witty and thought provoking and can fish out some badass music). i can tell you of dozens of times (this morning included) where you, mister porkmarras, turned my day around.

second and most important of all, you are an intelligent, entertaining and caring person, one that you don't encounter everyday. i'm sure you can find a way to get on with your life and be happy.

take care man,

marcos.

i'm not sure how much i want to post here about this but i'll try.

first, the good news is that you probably won't die of a heartbreak. you have too many good instincts on your side.

second is that recognizing that powerlessness is good-- i know i sound like a 12-stepper but i mean it. these are things and feelings you can't control. the way to deal with them is not by putting a leash on them but by opening up & letting them through. having a friend to share (you mention someone in your post) is a good thing. don't expect answers, just, let it out, then be kind to yourself & let yourself get better.

i was beaten with a bag of oranges. you don't see me whining.

I can only say that you are the best. All of you. I am going to try and get some sleep and stop thinking altogether, and again thank you and thank you and thank you. I sincerely hope that I didn't come across as a totally pathetic creature, I seriously needed to get stuff of my chest. You guys rock effortlesly.

just so i don't get bitched at, i'm just trying to bring some humour into a situation that could desperately use some, don't get offended or anything. i feel the same way that everyone else does about beating your kids.

As it happens, i never got a beating as a kid. Why do you not read without thinking about yourself? ta.

how a bag of oranges?

seriously how? i can't picture the mechanics.

ps: was it a bag or a sack?

sack. pardon.
and no i was not beaten as a child.

I'm actually a bit frightened at how closely i identify with this and phoenix's thread . And there is a lot of good advice/support in them that i will try to listen to as well . I'm glad you both made these threads !

it's a bit clearer now, but i still think it's difficult to actually do so...and i bet it's painful, so ouch.

well actually no, no pathetism, it takes strength & balls of steel to speak out, and say what's in you, so congratulations there.

and good night there, i hope you sleep better tonight.

well apparently we just all dont have any friends because we come here.

except I rarely come here of late.

it's a technic used to minimize bruising.

I thought it made big bruises but doesnt do too much damage? I know only from hearsay though.

I'm really sorry but I've been waiting long enough...

There's no where else I'd rather take my top off, either.

ever got hit with an orange? it's more painful than you think, especially if it's already being softened by punching.

did phoenix offer to take her top off? i approve the motion.

Venting one way or the other is always a huge help.....I should really do it more myself. Having "friends" who you can truly trust and who like you for you are few and far between.....I know exactly what you mean. Feel free to drop me a line if you ever want someone to talk to.

No need to feel bad about venting this here. We care about you. Let it out if that's what feels right. And try to get a little bit stronger each day. You can do it.

Porky my man ... just to let you know, if you ever feel weak, discomforted, or with a sudden urge just to talk to anybody in this virtual dark-blue area and if noone is around, I'm here for you.

i have to admit i was hesitant to read past the first line you wrote because it sounded overly dramatic. but upon reading what you have to say, i find it lacking in pathetic qualities. i think your gut instinct to "get this off yr chest" indicates a strength you don't see in yourself and an innate desire to move on and keep living. go with it.