A friend of mine showed me his wank sock once. Never mind the smell, imagine the sight of a sports sock covered in dried yellowing semolina. Ugh. Needless to say, I dragged him down to the pub soon afterwards, and we never spoke of the sock again.

what a marvelous thread to kick back and just read.

please do go on, this is powerful fun.

as far as things that "fit well" this would be much more my style

with the devil horns of course.

Ha ha, oh how I laugh.

cantanky with devil horns...unstoppable!

i'm unstoppable with or without.


i can't wait to get old so i can reminisce about my youth, prancing about in corsets and high heels and devil horns

by "unstoppable" i meant "mighty sexai".

My girlfriend often wears skeleton gloves... that's what I'm talkin about.

And on the seventh day, God created this thread.

You're making that up, I caught you brushing your nose as you typed it.

I know a guy who cummed up his keyboard once.

He shot his load up in the air and it landed in between the keys and he tried to get it out but quickly gave up and just let it dry there.

Nah I'm not making that up.

Have you seen my girlfriend? She's a cosplayer. She makes costumes all the time and shit. I happen to enjoy that thankfully, heh.

[In the voice of Bender from "Futurama"] - Enough talk, show us the pictures of her!"

Enough pictures, I wanna talk to her.

haha.

Nah, I don't feel like putting pictures of her up on THIS thread.

i've never had a woman give me a blow job and be able to get me off. never. oral sex is foreplay to me.

Fair do's. Can you show me your cock instead?

How about a bloke? Any more joy then?

has anyone had a good handjob done by somebody else?

This is your second and final warning Melly. Anymore of that and it's an early shower.