Sonic Youth Gossip - atsonicpark

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- - atsonicpark (http://www.sonicyouth.com/gossip/showthread.php?t=35388)

keep the bizarro-erotica pics up to date.....

(ones w/o scary dildo arms are welcomed all the same)

Yeah. And when folks just want to say hi.
Hi2u!

ruinhorse live show from 10 years ago!:
http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#!/...d=317214062660

scissor shock show from 3 years ago:
http://www.facebook.com/video/video....d=317214062660

when i was in hospital once there was a woman with ocd. after eating she would clean the tables and noone would get in her way. she would get down and try to look horizontally across the surface of the table for dirt and shit. when she was doing this NOBODY was going to fuck with her.

from what adam says i wish i had ocd that i could turn on and off like a tap. it would really help me get my shit in order.

Hahah, I can't turn it off permanently, I just kinda got used to it for the most part and learned to cope with it. Pills help.

Well, I recently reacquired the entire discographies of my old bands ranger raccoon and stagedive suicide, and this is might exciting times indeed! These classic albums I made when I was 12 and 13 years old were just waiting to be rediscovered. I am going to put it all up on last.fm soon. Here's a few Ranger songs from like 2001... as you can tell, I have always been a genius of electronic art music.. Hahaha.

http://www.sendspace.com/file/49t6qh
http://www.sendspace.com/file/9u49i0
http://www.sendspace.com/file/727j9u
http://www.sendspace.com/file/0cfiz6

oh man this song is the shit!

http://www.sendspace.com/file/2iu9rj

I don't know if I have OCD but most of the times I am like this:

Quote:

I have to put things in a certain way. Whenever I have change in my hands the head sides have to face each other. When I was younger everything I read I had to read it backwards too. And I would have to count things from 1-6 and backwards too before I let go of things. However, I am not sure it is OCD I have.

I have a DVD burner so I want to burn all my "Actual" dvd's and have burnt copies, since I have thousands (yes, thousands) of burnt movies at this point, so why have any actual copies? So, every day, I'm looking at the 73 actual movies I have left and I go, "I need to burn those." Then, I start to and I go, "Eh. No. It's only 73 movies.. why waste the time burning them? I love these movies.. I'm not going to make much money selling em... Why take the time.. why waste the time/effort.." And this argument has been going on in my head, hardcore, for a few months now, ever since I finally got a dvd burner.. constantly arguing with myself.. fucked up.

Quote:

Originally Posted by SONIC GAIL

I'm weighing in on the OCD topic. I have OCD and take medicine for it. Atsonic hit the nail on the head with everything. I'm not really a neat freak, but I get nervous when things are not a certain way. For instance I may have a sink full of dishes, but my canned goods are stacked with all the labels facing outward. When I clean something I never finish I need to scrub more and more and I keep getting distracted with the next thing i see before i know it 8 hours have gone by and i still have not finished. When I get an idea about the way my day or an event is going to happen it has to go that way or i starting getting really irritable almost like a kid...it has to happen how i envisioned it. I would constantly worry about things that were very unlikely to happen.

I need everything PERFECT in my relationships i feel the need to be perfect in every action to my family..I will beat myself up to no end over minor things sometimes imagined things. I put a great strain on everyone around me I was trying so hard to be what I thought was "perfect" that i acomplished the opposite. So these actions led to my most life changing experience......and i woke up and realized for the first time how i was and what i was doing.

I feel a little more free now. I know how i am reacting, acting and percieving and most times i can stop myself and get a fresh view on things. I still constantly check to make sure things are not missing, but not as much as i used to. You have to learn to let it go at a point. It helps me to talk to my husband about my anxiety over something. He helps me to see it from another perspective...and in the end i just need some reassurance that it will be ok.

Atsonic's right it could be worse! There are some advantages to being this way. My perfectionism is my drive to not give up on anything.

I'm like that in the sense that things have to be a certain way or they affect me. Like I even can't watch particular movies in different occasions, like seasonal, or else it will completely affect my mood and I either feel unsettled or get somber. Where as my girlfriend can watch anything I choose, which is a blessing because while I don't like being like that, you feel you have to be like that, and it's great when your partner is understanding and laidback.

The worst thing is when you have to do something, like something in repetition or just have to do something that isn't necessary because you feel you have to, or else like something shit will happen if you don't. That's the worst thing about it.

I can see that being a clean freak or whatever can be an advantage, but the latter lends no favours, at all.

What's medication like for it? Is it particularly for OCD or is it for anxiety?

Personally, I was taking Buspar... which is for anxiety AND depression and seemed to help, a bit.

...now, I self-medicate.

hey adam, i've got about 90% of the Robe. torrent but just noticed a new "fixed" torrent. what was wrong with the first one, i don't want to d/l it all again.

wtf? I really have no idea... isn't KYLE WILLEY on your facebook? msg him and ask him about it, I guess, since it's his thing...

ok, i just messaged him...

ranger raccoon's whole discography is here

http://www.last.fm/music/Ranger+Raccoon