Well this has been amazing people, I'm going to the post office to get some Euros for monday, because it beats this hands down.

you satisfied now?

not so much. I feel like I ordered a steak and got a year-old McDonald's Happy Meal instead (minus the toy).

the toy's the tastiest bit

yeah that's right right this is sissydrama

we want porndrama

no porndrama, i want porno for pyros

alternatively, yes.

if you've ever seen them live, you would know that they ARE porndrama.

fire-breathing lesbian-contortionists can't be beat!

That's quite ironic coming from a guy who consists of only wires and circuit boards..

Yes, but your problems are REAL. And this is an internet message board. Nobody wants to talk about anything real here. That's what friends and psychiatrists are for.

And I'm not interested. If I were, I would be asking you if you were all right, if there was anything I could do to help. I'm not. I don't like painting myself with such unflattering imagery, but if a man kicks a homeless guy who is asking him for change, could you really argue that the man was interested in him?

Anyone fancy pizza?

first: "no u".

second: you can't bump threads and then bitch about people taking notice, when afterall, you instigated it.

third: offer for cyber still stands (I'm over 18).

HOW DARE YOU!!!


this post is being brought to you by the FloSloCo Counter-Trolling Division, a wholly-owned subsidiary of FloSloCo Industries.

Take it all with a grain of salt.

oh sweet jesus, this thread just got good.

I've just asked my minion to hold all calls.

fucking Al Qaeda, I tells ya.

^^^ make such baseless insinuations about our normalcy.

now, if you'll please have a seat over there (------->), Against_the_Grain just showed up and he has MUCH more to answer to than you do.

questions like "how's peaches?"

Against The Grain creeps me out

now, one must ask "are elmo-maniac and against_the_groin in fact, the same person?"

THAT would be some mind-blowing shit imo.

nah, Against The Grain is far more direct than Elmoniac i think

well, they've both shown themselves to be prime candidates for co-starring with Chris Hansen.

quick, someone disguise themselves as a 14 year old and see they reply again!!!

ok...well, that was tasteless on my part (but I won't stop anyone from actually doing it).

it's tasteless but fair and true

I saw her, I missed her,Now it's all over.Nothing creepy about it though, it happens all the time. Just ask any number of rockstars. As Tom Jones sang, "It's not unusual".

ha ha ha ha ah ah ah ah ha haahah hkahajkahkajba

^^^ get rid of the beard. you look too old.


you best be trollin'.

why don't YOU just have a seat over there?

oh this thread needs me so bad

are you over 15? if yes, GTFO.

yess thread yeaaa
uh huh
oh, hang on
no don't worry i just need to change the music
ah shucks you'll love it thread

where were we

This thread has made my Friturday. (That's Friday and Saturday combined, because I think tomorrow I'll still be laughing to myself a little. And maybe pee a little. And throw up in my throat a little, but swallow it back down a little.)

gently slides the heels of his palms over thread's shoulders, feeling for any tense knots. oh my, thread, you ARE worked up. just try and breathe slowly, but not too slow, you don't want to pass out now do you thread? haha.

rolls his palms over the top of thread's shoulders and kneeds his fingers into thread's tense knots. you should take better care of yourself thread, drink more healthy things like carrot juice and milk from the teats of a budding gazelle. yes now sniff some of these vapors.
aww what don't you trust me?
well i can hardly go around giving away all my secrets can I. silly thread.
*whispers* but I like you thread so i'll tell you something i don't tell anyone else. to get the vapor just right the trick is to use real orphans. oh real orphans, yes they do get themselves worked, ah I see you know what i mean. so just breath in these vapors and let me work

Now thread you're going to love this. Oh it's nothing, it just has an unfortunate appearence is all. You can't just be going around and putting down every horseman's flail that you see just cus of wee little bit of rust and ok so maybe that's a bit of skull but just a bit and - Thread! Stop that thread! How do you think you get all those knots?

Hit you with it? of course i'm not going to hit you with this, that would hurt, might even maim or kill you. No the flail is just here as a student observer.
Have the vapors kicked in? A little? okay well I'll wait another few minutes. I'm going to let flail hang around a bit and ask you some questions before we proceed. I'm due down at the rink for a quick zamboni lurch across the rogue river piled lawn chairs elk again mollusks again pulled lawn chairs fences brick sebastians and overloaded micromachines
but thread you are the real thing

you had me at micromachines. and by had me, I mean, I think I might be pregnant. :(

Wow, that is creepy. Is it weird that I am repping you for you intense creepiness? Should you even take that as a compliment?



I think you should.

creepy zmegalofork, that was just me and thread getting to know each other. And now that I'm back with this abandoned rocket oxidizer that your acl ligaments salvaged for me from a wrecked Y-Wing off the coast of Costa Rica where Michael Crichton once spent three romantic weeks on an island with his diesel girl Tiffany.
They utilized the fuse boxes beneath their loins and gave birth to a kingdom of terrible lizards which would eventually convince Sam Neal to table yukon proles the sorrow corner /
but it isn't like that anymore thread, don't get down on yourself when we're doing so well. How're those shoulders now? See I told you.
Now what you need to do is take this Oxidizer and hold it ... with your hands what the hell else are you going to hold it with. I don't believe you. Threads have hands they've always had hands. Look everyone here is just trying to help you thread. we want you to glisten shark we want you to bury sky with atmospheric dirt and resurrect all your thread-like fossils that to this day still fight the pangs of sorrow whenever your frayed self rises like so many Dakota ghosts on the eve of midsummer and yeah they do their dance and yeah maybe some other threads get set to flame; but that isn't you thread.
There are no Dakota ghosts for pages yet, and television too, all for you my friend, just hold this Oxidizer in your pitifully frayed cloth tendrils; you disgust me, you belong in a stagnant bog. No it wouldn't be fair to diseased turtles that have managed to eek out a slight immunal defense mechanism to fend off the toxins that Sam Neal dumps into it Every. Other. Week.

Just hold the Oxidizer, I don't even care anymore. Someone's knee really went out of joint to locate this artifact now how about a little respect.

Flail, did you get your answers? Ok then, good job. That piece of baboon needs to charge for at least an hour before it is operational. Let's get out of here before vinyl disaster opaque.

wow........

because

I don't know exactly what the fuck is going on in here, but I do know this is completely unacceptable, floating. We are through. Have fun with your new girlfriend. Maybe she will make you tacos.

who the hell are you?

wait....tacos, you say?

don't worry girlgun, floatingslowly can make tacos. it is a staple meal for guys. If a guy can't make himself some delicious tacos then he's simply removed and replaced by someone who can.

a man's ability to make tacos is a sacred tradition that dates back to ok i'm sick of myself. enough kloriel today.