Talking of no-talent pop stars, did you see that woman from Steps on Masterchef? Fat Claire I think her name is.

No fucking way! Claire from Steps was lovely back in the day. That's just downright depressing that is.

She was never in the same league as Roberts, but still. That's a big shame.

She certainly was:


I kind of admire her though because she's proper fat. I mean really fat. Not just gossip mag fat, but really......well, fat.

One of these listens to Boris, the other is a right Doris.

Haha! Brilliant! We're off to a great start.

Yeah, that's how i remember her.

Yeah, there's 'fat for a celebrity' and then there's just 'fat'. Claire is just 'fat' now. Good on her i say. She'll be popping up in Icelands adverts before you can say pollards knickers.

Is that Bonnie Langford on the left?

hahaha! She really is fat.

You just woudn't even look twice at the one on the right.

No. It isn't. But more to the point. who is that in your avatar?

Quite, just the sort you see in an All Bar One getting pissed with her mates while the one on the left is checking out Mascis' pedals at a Witch gig.

Claire's boyfriend looks super gay. Reminds me a bit of Linda Lusardi's hubby. I mean what's the story their? For fucks sake!

I don't know All Bar One but I imagine it's a meat factory in the same vein as, say, Oceana. My knowledge of underground rock is poor to say the least but I'm still enjoying these references and I imagine Nicola would too.

All Bar One is a shitty chain of pubs for city types.

I don't know who these plebs are nor do I want to. Nicola is of aristocratic nature if not by birth.

ewww!

Like Wetherspoons but worse?

Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud Girls Aloud

That should get her attention.