I take it back. I don't hate everything. right now, I'm really enjoying the news article "comedian discharged after suicide attempt". nine self-inflicted stab-wounds! that impressive.

I'm not a junky for anything less than 5 self-inflicted stab-wounds.

I gladly pay you Thursday for a cup of Dark Roast today

Sometimes I think I hate everything too. But then I remember I only really hate people.

maybe that's my problem as well.

for what it's worth, I like you.

you might not be people.

When I like people I think of them as cats.

I hate nouvelle cuisine.

Do the people you like have a tendancy to shit in their neighbour's back garden?

yes.

it happened once.

tho i dont like her anymore.

My reputation.

Did she also kill a garden bird and leave it in your kitchen?

I only use the box.

you can get leukemia from going outside.

Dick Laurent is dead.

He is.

but this really happened.
ive known quite a few people who didnt like someone and decided to piss in their front garden.

however, this girl did not bury her product as politely as cats do.

I've pissed in a few gardens in my time. A couple of years ago I threatened our neighbours with shitting in their garden if they didn't stop hammering past 11 (seriously, they were hammering until 4 in the morning one night, and I was on early shifts). Funnily enough, the hammering stopped, which is a shame as I was quite looking forward to taking a shit in their garden.

NOT a junky about


slow-jams
Thomas Kinkaid
people who do not read (not those who can not read, but those that can and choose not to)
blondes in porn
Beck
Dark Side Of The Moon
religion

did you consider the difficulties?

i mean, most people find it difficult to do anywhere but their own bathroom, imagine that.

and frankly

i would continue hammering.

if all you're going to do is shit in my garden.

Yeah, I would too. I'm good at calling people's bluffs though.

I did consider how I'd do it - into a carrier bag then over the wall. Simple!

The same people have apparently complained to other neighbours about the music coming from our house as well. Not so much the volume, but the sort of music. They don't even make eye contact with me since the shit threat. Cunts.

If I'm caught short, I always take a leak in public. What choice do I have save pissing my pants?

The sort of music, yes. I heard someone say today: if they listen to classical music out loud fine, if it's some sort of indian or african loud music we don't have to stand it.