Incidentally, I had a Greggs sausage roll today. From that place down on Lewins Mead. Not as good as that one opposite the galleries with that fit/ miserable Spanish broad. Lena, I think her name is. Just opposite Castle Park there. Yeah, that's the one. Good sausage rolls in there, I tells 'ee.

They couldn't see a fight. THEY'RE IN THE FUCKARSE OF NOWHERE.

Australia's three great achievmants: Mad Max, Norman Gunston and the fact that Australians aren't quite as irritating as South Africans.

yes, well, those crazy japanese have a knack for showing up when and where you least expect them.

ANZAC = surrender monkeys

that said, you've never been to oklahoma, have you?

I'm so very hard right now. this poist hsa been typde wihg mhay pejjois

I have family from Ireland who moved to SA. Really annoying people. The sort of people who think it's ok to talk blowjobs with a pensioner.

where ive just moved has no less than THREE bakers (including a Greggs) on the high street, plus a Wimpy. Its seventh heaven i tells 'ee. Except for the Wimpy which was a massive dissapointment. No wonder theyve practically gone out of business.

I saw there's a new cafe opened down round the back of the White Horse. You know, Dave's local. Gammy leg, that's him. Looks like a proper cardiac cafe, I'm looking forward to my first bacon and black pudding sarnie in there.

A Wimpy has just opened here. There was one in the market square until the redevelopment.

But now it's back. I haven't had a bender for quite some time. Looking forward to it.

rinky dinky
spurs are on their way to wembley
doin the lambeth walk
knees up mother brown

ergggh....black pudding. you people disgust me.

Again, behind every 'good will and peace to all men' lies the black heart of a true misanthropist.

space is racist too.

There are no decent cafes around my way at all. The best is run by an Italian bloke who can't follow basic intructions.

Bloody immigrant non-instruction following Italians.

I promised to keep it contained. would you like for me to go back on my word?? you've not even seen how deep my inner-peace goes. deeper than atlantis.


1) thank you for suggesting that I have a giant cock (yr right)
2) viva la raza

You wouldn't get that with a Turk, I tell you. Joe, of Joe's Kebabs - he knows to stop when I ask him to. Raj down at the Indian as well, he knows how I like my poppadoms. The problem with Italians is they think they know best. Raj wouldn't ever do that sort of shit.

italians aren't so bad compared to chinese, don't even bother ordering a full english if it's going to be cooked by an elderly china man, they make everything taste of water.

Liechensteinians are pretty good.