Pretty much I blame any problem during December on my "shitter being full" and my first question to anyone's problem is "did you check your shitter?" Also, "Merry Christmas, Kiss My Ass, Kiss His Ass, Kiss Your Ass, Happy Hanukkah" is said way too much. I really don't even need to watch the movie anymore.

comething?

Hahahaha. I think I'll start that too. Just for the hell of it.

Oh, "bend over and I'll show you" and "Can I refill your eggnog for you? Get you something to eat? Drive you out to the middle of nowhere and leave you for dead?"

I also have this memorized:
"I want him brought right here, with a big ribbon on his head, and I want to look him straight in the eye and I want to tell him what a cheap, lying, no-good, rotten, fore-fleshing, low-life, snake-licking, dirt-eating, inbred, overstuffed, ignorant, blood-sucking, dog-kissing, brainless, dickless, hopeless, heartless, fat-ass, bug-eyed, stiff-legged, spotty-lipped, worm-headed sack of monkey shit he is. Hallelujah. Holy shit. Where's the Tylenol?"

Hahahahahaha. WIN

It all fades in from black on old women’s fake dentures sinking their teeth succulently in to juicy hunks of chicken flesh in a way that is almost sexual. Sucking sounds fill the air. Licking and scrapping, and gnawing their way to the bones only to suck more on the stringy muscle fibers that remain tethered from the drumstick.

Flashes of men dancing in some tribal preto-natural way. Voodoo Drum sounds flooding the atmosphere.

Camera pans in on a small boy dirty and half clothed, sitting in a mound of silt holding a vinyl record. Camera pans left slightly to reveal a similarly dressed man sitting on some sort of elaborate parade float holding a record player. The boy rubs up the man’s leg with his fingertips until he reaches the lap and onto the record player. He put’s the record on and hits play. When the needle makes contact with the record and the record starts to spin loud explosions and whistles fill the air and you see faded over images of missile fire from World War 2.

Camera fades in still framed on a plowed field with bloody arms and legs coming out of the field like crops. Half buried bodies almost fully grown out of the rows. As sad mournful 70’s style psychedelic music plays.

Narration starts over the music:

“These bodies will grow into men. They will be harvested at a time the government will appoint by law. They will be handed their draft cards and a bottle of cheap whisky and will be encouraged to propagate their race with diseased hookers and junkies so that their kind will easily accept defeat and lay down their lives before gods and rich alike.”

A man with a monocle and top hat approaches and points to one of the bodies in the field and says, “I’ll take that one.” and pointing at another “That one.”

Camera comes in through a doorway into some sort of medical lab. The two selected men are strapped to a table and the man with the monocle is present. A nurse with huge tits looking like a 14 year old boy’s wet dream fantasy proceeds to squirt perfume in the mens’ eyes and poke and prod them with various instruments.

Narration:

“His new line of perfume is a success! The fragrance is exhilarating. The test bodies will be burned and no one will know of the side effects because they are…minimal and only effect poor people.”

Now a camera view of bodies being burned and loud screams flood through the crackling roar of the fire.

A normal looking man strolls through a village of tents along a dusty path. Tons of mountain dew cans and TV dinner boxes flood out of the tents. Popcorn bags tumble through like tumble weeds. The man walks down the trail and looks inside the first tent.

Tent 1: A woman in unflattering baggy underwear washing dishes in a bucket while a man sits reclined in a chair drinking a beer and looking at a TV. The TV has NASCAR on it and the man is yelling at the woman “I work all god damn day and come home and you can’t even have dinner ready? Your pussy’s fuckin’ rotten. I don’t know why I’m with you.”

The man goes back to the trail and zigzags across to tent 2.

Tent 2: Is empty except for a dog in a sweater vest barking backwards.

Man continues.

Tent 3: contains a man in a bear mask taking a shit on a toilet and stuffing his face with handfuls of honey.

Tent 4: contains sleazy methed out crack whore taunting the man to come inside for 20 bucks. A girl in the far corner injects heroin into her thigh and falls back into the corner.

Tent 5: A priest and a rabbi arguing and ripping at each others garbs and religious trinkets.

Camera starts in a graveyard and the man from the first tent is standing over a grave holding a pot and a can of corn. “God Damn it how’m I gonna cook this. I work all god damn day and come home and their ain’t no dinner. You aren’t worth shit. Your pussy’s fuckin' rotten. I don’t know why I’m with you.”

Time for sleeping. Peace.

The man twists his mustache and checks his watch. As the seconds tick closer to noon the camera flashes a speeding train several time and then cuts to a woman tied to the tracks. The train speeding down on her the man jumps near her side and rubs and smells her hair. The woman screams I’ll do anything. Let me go! The man unties her and she is saved. She says thank you sir for saving me. Did you see the man who did this to me? The man said no. She asked “How did you know I was here” The man explains “There is always a woman here at noon. They always say that they will do anything and I always let them go. “I see said the woman.” What do you want of me? The man thinks for several seconds. Tilts his head to the side and said lift your dress for starters. She lifts it a little. Higher…a little more, HIGHER, HIGHER, HIGHER, till I see nothing but crotch. She lifts and she screamed. I knew it he yelled. I knew it would happen…He removes a pair of scissors and chops off clumps of her pubic hair and puts them in a glass jar and he scurries away and the woman falls to her side and cries. The man bounds over a hill, along a river, and to a little clearing by some trees. There are drag marks along the ground. He follows them. He reaches Christ and the devil carrying a cross covered in sweat. He hands Jesus the jar and takes the cross from them and drags it up the road and is gone. Jesus and the devil exhausted sit against a tree. They open the jar and stuff their mouths full of the young girl’s pubic hair. Slowly it revitalizes them. They then laugh with mouthfuls of hair.

Narration: The gods are rich and with them we poor men may be rich as well.

Switch to the tents and all the people come running out with their mouths full of pubic hair dancing around like they had won the lottery rejoicing.

I don't know what shirt to wear tonight. I would wear my Misfits but I still think it's hokey to wear a shirt of the band you're going to see...even if it is Misfits. I'm thinking maybe Skinny Puppy or one of my non-band black shirts.

keyboard slam bjhn,dfjkdfhjfj

I'm a sucker for girls with Eastern European/Russian accents.

Off to the Misfits!!!

have fun josh! lots of details when you get back.. if you're not tired out.

my hattrick team will play a friendly match at ลาส นอร์เช่ ฮูเอโกมุนโด้ บลีช stadium in prathet thai

qué bien!

Hola camaron sin cola.

fngvbsdjfbgjksdbfgfjkbasdjfbsdjkbfjkasbfjkasbfbasj kbfjkasbfjkbasjkfbasjkbfajksbfjasbjfbasjkfb

OK, I think I need to get off the internet NOW...

What?

"You're one of us."
"You're one of us."
"You're one of us."
"You're one of us."
"You're one of us."
"You're one of us."
"You're one of us."
"You're one of us."
"You're one of us."

I'll just go bullet form:

• Most violent show I've ever been to. I was in/on the edge of the mosh the whole time.
• I did a lot of fist-pumping and singing.
• I also cracked my head against some chick's skull.
• The only songs they didn't play I wanted to hear were "Demonomania" and "We Bite"
• "Skulls", "Astro Zombies", "I Turned Into A Martian", and "Hybrid Moments" will go down as some of my best live moments

• The pit during "Die, Die My Darling" was the most intense I've ever seen.

• I called the venue and they told me they had coat check, but when I got there they said they didn't have one for this show, So I was stuck in my coat all night. I rolled up the sleeves and put my scarf in my pocket.
• I have never been covered in the sweat of so many other people. I'd say upwards of 20.
• During the opening band, a beer cup was thrown and somehow beer ended up in my pocket.

That's about it I guess.
Here's the part where I reaffirm my statement that I'd rather be in a pit with punks than at a show full of hipsters any day.

I lol'd at this.

http://www.liveleak.com/view?i=377_1228376432

Someone left my cake outside in the rain and I don't think I can take it, cause it took so long to bake it and I'll never have the recipe agaîn oh noooooooooooooooooooooooo!

I have that song on my ipod.

Oh shit! Today's purchases:
Peanut Butter
2 kinds of icing: butter creme and vanilla
gum
sweettarts
12 pack of Coca-Cola
French/English Dictionary
Shake The Sheets - Ted Leo and the Pharmacists
What's Eating Gilbert Grape

J/O.....

josh- my favorite ted leo album! YES! and that sounds a hell of a night.... i may have to go see them now.

I'd say go if you've got nothing to do then. If you're not familiar with them you'll probably not want to be right in the thick of things, but you can just hang back and enjoy some kitschy horror-punk. They also played 2 or 3 Black Flag songs.

AH! French Final tomorrow. Ne vouloir pas!

yeah, it's at the firestone so i could go sit up on the second level and score some six dollar red bulls and snark on the hipsters there to look like they have diverse music tastes if things get wild.

Haha, I had a field day before the show picking out the frat boys that ran out to Hot Topic and bought Misfits shirts because they are all the same design (albeit mine is too, but I wasn't wearing it at the time. I'm not that lame). Also this "tough guy metal-head kid" in front of me got super-pissed the first time someone brushed against him that he left and stood at the side the whole time. Also, there was this "goth" kid, more like juggalo but super thin, he couldn't have been more than 14 or 15, (trip pants, loads of zippers and ripped arm warmers) that looked EXACTLY like the tall kid in this .gif.


He ripped off his shirt at the end of the show and tried to rush to get Jerry to sign it but got pwned by a wall of punks.

i know a kid who looks just like the one you described, and acts like that. and god, i'm glad his twin got pwned. trip pants just make me make so many judgements about a person. partially, i feel bad, but i mean.. trip pants.

that .gif's going to stay with me forever. that's hilarious.

I felt kind of sorry for the kid almost. I thought about walking over, patting him on the shoulder, and telling him to drop the act and join A/V and Latin clubs.

Well, I must go get my study on now and try not to load up on too much sugar/coffee and crash. Laterz.

been spending on night working on my new ipod touch, i am guessing this will dominate my attention for a while

yeah, i know what you mean. some kids i see i just wonder if they haven't been hugged enough.

i hate that this weekend i can't stay up late at all. i'm more than a little miffed. and terriblecanyons is probably moving before the new year, so i'm ultimately upset.

:( sadness about terrible's leaving.

That sucks schizo.

It's not set in stone yet. My parents still don't want me around, but the fact they have no cash and are willing to spend every last penny shipping me out is kind of ...daunting.

WTF, your parents are sending you away?

Not the first time.
Hey, if it's between them threatening to throw me in a psych ward or them sending me to live somewhere they aren't, I'm definitely chosing the latter.

Fuck, let's me you and schizo move to new york.

I'm down with that.
I'd love to live there.