OMG That is fucking awesome.

i nearly strangled a kid by his tie when i was at school. he used to try and bully me, well he was kinda easily led and some other kid used him as a weapon and told him i said something bad about him so he hit me in the head with a chair. so grabbed him and began to strangle him and had to be forced away from him by several other people. he was looking very purple is all i remember. that was kinda bad.

i held a cat hostage once.... he didnt pay, so i made him eat his left over catfood. i dint open the tin... he didnt appreciate it. he threw the tin at me and called me a wanker so i shot him in the face.... right in the face..... he called me a wanker again so i put him outside in the rain, face up with one of those animal collars that look like a lampshade.. it was raining heavy so it filled up quite quickly.. he didnt drown, he drank the rain...he was a clever cat!

he died about 3 hours ago....... from boredom....he was listening to the fleet foxes album on repeat....i made him do it.......

^ HAhahahaa