Kim Gordon's memoir Girl in a Band: 10 things we learned
 

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The last song on The Eternal is “Massage The History,” the only song Gordon admits is about her marriage. “It has the line ’I dreamed’ in it, maybe because I was dreaming of the first record we ever made. It was before I found out what the dark cloud following Thurston around consisted of, but I already felt it.” On the song, Gordon sings, “Here’s wishing you were with me/ Here’s wishing we could massage history.” Having detected a downward slope in the marriage, Gordon chalked it up to normal relationship valleys, saying also that, “when a marriage ends … little things you never noticed before practically make your head split open … I was aware of his unhappiness, but I made excuses, too. I had my doubts about our relationship, but I pushed them under, reasoning that every long-term relationship has its pitfalls.” Her hope was evident in the song, which now plays like the dying gasp of Sonic Youth’s career.

“During rehearsal, and all that week, I remember Thurston making a point of telling the band he didn’t want to perform this or that Sonic Youth song. It suddenly hit me that certain songs he wanted to leave out were about her.”



Dang

Which is totally understandable. While I'm a fan of Kim the musician (Sonic Youth would not be the band they are without her), I could more or less care less about her as a person. By her own account, she was aware of this affair for a long time before she decided it was best for them to split. I can understand her disrespect and ill-emotions toward his actions. I can't understand, nor appreciate, the fact that she could care less about tarnishing the legacy (one mostly full of music, and not the sort of "behind the scenes VH1 Special gossip I expect with Hole and Motely Crue) of something that was quite beautiful for a long while. I view Thurston's actions as being normal (they are). I suppose the emotions she's expressing are normal, too. I'm just not a fan of that shit. Their business is not the world's business.

And seriously..."he threw a stapler and I was scared". OMFG give me a break. Bitching NOW about some shit that happened nearly 30 years ago. Tacky, tacky, tasteless.

Lifetime movie in the making.

"I don't pay attention to what my favorite artists do outside of music. If I did, I'd just hate all of them" - - < heard a friend say that once, + I couldn't, especially at my current age, agree more.

“Tom had moved across the country to escape her.” This move may or may not have been the catalyst for O’Rourke’s departure from Sonic Youth in 2005; O’Rourke set his sights for Japan around that time. One year later, Prinz and Moore started a publishing company together, Ecstatic Peace Library."


whaaa? so Prinz stands behind Jim leaving SY as well? unbelievable! if that is true, that means she is to blame for everything bad that happened with SY!?

yep. she was married to some rich rich super rich fuck and had an affair with O'Rourke.

haha.

My wife put it well. she said "well, then Thurston turned out to be a straight poser." and I asked what she meant and she said that Sonic Youth and it's members have always stood for authenticity and earnestness and a desire to be as un-fake as possible but only a fucking liar poser would pretend nothing is wrong for over a year after his wife caught him cheating and continue with the cheating. a real man would have kept his dick in his pants, explained to his wife that he wanted a divorce, and then go on with his life.

I said "Dang."

Thurston Moore is to blame, not Eva Prinz. She wasn't in the band to start with, he was.

yep.

Um... OK?

that is too cool

cronenberg!!!

It's weird, I remember when Demolished Thoughts came out, thinking it sounded like a young man in love had written it. You could tell he was completely besotted. That impression became more amplified to me as soon as the separation was announced later that same year...

sad story, feel bad for all sides.

not to be a dick but -
eva yoko fucking prinz REMOVED JIM then split sy up.

yoko at least made cool music. but noone needs any more shitty beat poetry.

we could have used jim on every post nurse record though.

t-dogs mind was clouded by the judgement of his roving wang, and maybe also all the money that eva must have got from divorcing that rich dude. pity she couldnt settle for that instead of fucking up sy too.

anyway, what matters is that kim is happy.

I'm inclined to agree. Whilst what Thurston did just smacks of mid-life crisis at least he's pretty much kept schtum about the whole thing. Kim isn't doing anyone any favours writing a book about the whole thing.

However, me being the stupendous hypocrite I am, I'll be reading it.

It's not a book about the whole thing, it's a memoir about her whole life, her split from Thurston and Sonic Youth which was a significant part thereof.

shes doing herself favours by making money off whatever she can.

good for her.

swa's load of mysognistic horseshit is typical of him. the 'legacy' is not actually something he owns, its other peoples relationship which he strangely idealizes then blames kim for ruining his perception of. why? well hes angry at kim out of sublimation of his lust to ride thurstons silver rocket. check please.

also thrushtowne has released how many songs and poetry books etc about his new relationship?

oh but if kim does it once as a single chapter in her memoir, which she has every right to do, then thats not cool.

exactly.

And no one knew about it until their laundry started getting aired. Again I'm not defending him. cos it was a dick move. But they've all been knobheads about it.

I get that. However it'll be interesting to see how much is related to the divorce compared to the rest of her (much more interesting) life. A chapter and the whole story is told. Hopefully that'll be that, but I suspect not.

The example of Thurston throwing a stapler was just stupid. You've never thrown stuff in frustration? Everyone has at some point.

kim has done nothing wrong whatsoever.

shes told her story which involves other people. she hasnt been particularly mean or vindictive and has even showed empathy for t-dog.

relationships are sex built on top of chaos most of the time anyway.

sad that so many fans would obviously have turned on her way more viciously had she done the 'offensive' thing like express anger or rage at a male who has wronged her.

That's a load of shit

what is happening is that Thurston is free to continue his life, and so is Kim. She has written a memoir of her life in music, which of course includes the SY breakup and the TM infidelity that prompted it.

he has kept mum about the whole thing because he is the one sticking his dick in a woman other than his wife (adultery) and he was caught by her and then denied it to her face when he kept it going. You dig? Kim has to sit around and read and watch and hear about thurston's interviews where he talks about how happy he is and how he is in a good place and in love and shit. THAT is as mean and hurtful to his wife (I think divorce papers are not finalized yet, am I right?) as anything she has written in her memoir.

this was not a mutual thing. he fucked around, he got caught, then lied about continuing to fuck around and being in love with someone else for over a year.

exactly.

also, EVERYONE involved has to read message board freaks gossiping about their private affairs while relying on same freaks for the continuation of their careers.

Ok look at the example of Maria Shriver and Schwarzenegger's illegitimate child. The dude was fucking douchebag for doing it and not saying anything about the child for the longest time. Maria found out and had the balls to say "fuck you, you're a fucking moron" walked away and that's that. She knows it ain't nobody else's business and she's kept the whole thing on the down low whilst being able to carry on with her career and life. Kudos to her.

And have I turned on her? Fuck no. I'd just rather her carry on with her own shit making music and the like.. Again I'm a raging hypocrite as I'll be reading the book.

everyone look up! it's stu's banhammer descending upon this thread.

So that justifies her writing about it all? Nah I don't buy it. To claify again yes Thurston was a total moron for what he did and I', not defending him for what he did.

ebebebeb

she doesnt have to justify writing about it at all, she can do so if she wants to.

not trying to be a dick here because you are being pretty reasonable about this.

anyway.

Fuck this made me lul hard. Also, this post with the signature below:

"I don't pay attention to what my favorite artists do outside of music. If I did, I'd just hate all of them" - - < heard a friend say that once, + I couldn't, especially at my current age, agree more.
__________________
Team Thurston!

do u liek the way swa uses cute lil + signs and, too, many, commas, and shit?

To me its pretty simple, if you are opposed to her "telling a story" then its up to you to NOT read it if you have that strong of a viewto look away. Its her right and freedom to tell it the way she sees it no matter who says so or not.

Why is it such a problem? It could be a therapeutical thing for her to continue to move on w/ her life. Why should you care? Why should anyone care?

Same goes for him, you either gonna respect the guy or not, or perhaps compartmentalize his life (the personal vs. the music, etc) it doesn't really seem to change the way he's going do things at this point obviously.

Pretty sure the band is dead and buried at this point as I don't think either one of them want to relive this portion of their musical history as it is very tied to their personal relationship with each other.

Not surprised some males on this board lack any compassion for a woman who's been treated in such an appalling manner and is writing about her life and work. And Thurston Moore can whinge all he likes about some feminists not being mature enough to understand ''adult'' relationships, he himself should really get a crash course on why honesty would make him a mature individual to deal with straight away. Unless he hasn't met an actual person traumatised by their partner's cheating since he started being an Indie pin up. I am not Charlie, I am not particularly a feminist and I have never been cheated on.

Kim does not need to justify anything in writing a book. NO ONE DOES. If you read the articles you would see that Kim was actually quite subtle and delicate in what she wrote in her book. she knows her daughter is gonna read it.

o.k. u're spot on there, but then when u have someone messing with two members of the same band, that sounds whore-ish to me.

yeah.
+
I mean poor Kim. She was the one who was cheated on. Imagine. Must feel like shit, if someone's cheating on you. In their case such a long relationship, wrecked marriage. I think she was hurt and lonely big time and yet she had to give explanation of what happened and how she see it. Must be hard.