What my Ex-Girlfriend had to say about me...
 

"Insensitive mother fucking bastard!! THE SCUM OF THE FUCKING WORLD! What a selfish son of a fuckin bitch. I have never meet someone so callous, mean or cruel in my entire life. How can he live with himself? How can you treat people like fucking trash and get up every morning and go through life? All this bastard is filled with is lies and distrust. I feel sorry for your friends and family that have to see you go through life treating people with no respect or commpassion... This boy needs to stop being a total FUCK UP and learn how to be a fuckin human. FUCK BARI KHAN."

She also egged my car and covered it in lettuce (I have borderline phobia with lettuce) and let the air out of one of my tires.

ha ha ha-- DAMN!!

so, what did you do to her? or is she just wacko?

It's a long story but, she was real in to me and I wasn't so much in to her. We ended up balling one time after we broke and I may or may not have alluded to the possibility of us getting back together. The next morning I let her know it was a mistake, and we should'nt talk anymore. Somewhere in the mix she tried to kill her self(sorta). But anyways we only dated for like two weeks so, she's nuts.

yes some people really dont others feelings into consideration.

ooooh sheeeeeettttttttttttt!!!

it's one of those...!

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Borderl...ality_disorder

i wish you good luck. you're gonna need it!

So, she's upset with you, I take it?

I fear for my life. I believe if I find out my tire is slashed and she didn't just let the air out, I'm calling the fuzz.

I hope she's not that girl of the animated gif... or should i hope so?

Thaat is the animated gif girl, she's all yrs.

You must spread some Reputation around before giving it to Richard Pryor on Fire again.

I laughed when I got to the "I may or may not have alluded to the possibility of us getting back together."

Keep us posted, man. If we don't hear from you again, I guess we should assume the worst?

Thanks, but I need to find some way to brainwash her first, then.... BTW she was really good looking, and looked like a cool gal, too bad she's crazy.

man, what is it with some chicks? You hurt their feelings and they decide to take it out on your personal property? It's pointless.

what you do is not talk to her for a bit, then , after a sufficient time has elapsed, ( a few weeks at least) you set it up so you run into her somewher and then when you see her ask her
"so....what are you doing for dick lately?"

hahahahh!!!

well, at least you know you gave it to her good. if you'd been a bad lay she would not give a fuck man.

My wife ripped the turntable off its shelf and threw it to the floor in a fit of rage one time. She knew I loved that thing possibly more than I loved, well, her. This was back in her days before Prozac. After a trip to the repair shop, the table survived for another 6 years or so, and our marriage has even longer. She's never done anything else like that, and we never talk about it.

me too! tell me more! what is it about the lettuce that's disturbing to you?

is it like this? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=neLpW0k2THo MY FEAR OF MUSTARD AND PICKLES IS RUINING MY LIFE! (no mention of lettuce)

that must be it gmku. women are way more hurt by words than men are. and they know that men are more hurt when something they prize is damaged or destroyed. that is why one, as a man, must pretend to not care about material hings, even one's turntable, and act as if you are a romantic sap whose emotions hang on every word of encouragement or discouragment, etc., and then when they get real pissed at you they will trry to say hurtful girlie things instead of destroying your shit and you can laugh in their face...

man, I am in a mood today! stress!


bth my g/f and my ex-wife are more into the physical violence revenge, probably because they know no matter what I would not hit them back, and that damage to my records/books would be an unforgivable offense. My g/f a few months ago got so mad at me she shoved her long-nailed fingers into mu mouth and gouged out my gums under my tongue, all while driving.. that was shocking.

So true. My daughter also picked up on this apparently. She stole my entire LP collection and my Taylor acoustic guitar and made off with the lot of it for two days. I had no idea where it was, she wouldn't tell me, and there was little I could do. I retrieved it all safely, and she got a lot of attention, but she sure had me in a frenzy.

Shortly after, I converted our linen closet to my LP closet, and the door locks. And even though she moved out years ago, there they stay.

I've never been in a relationship where there was actual physical hand-to-hand combat, though. Just psychological warfare.

She is? She looked really friendly on the picture.
Too bad to hear you dated a psycho.

Yeah she posted it twice as bulletin on myspace with my picture on it with a caption that read ASSHOLE ALERT!

I replied with this bulletin titled :Scum of the Earth! Right Here!

In response to: Insensitive mother fucking bastard!! THE SCUM OF THE FUCKING WORLD! What a selfish son of a fuckin bitch.
I have never meet someone so callous, mean or cruel in my entire life. How can he live with himself? How can you treat people like fucking trash and get up every morning and go through life? All this bastard is filled with is lies and distrust. I feel sorry for your friends and family that have to see you go through life treating people with no respect or commpassion...

This boy needs to stop being a total FUCK UP and learn how to be a fuckin human.



FUCK BARI KHAN.

There's been some bad Bari press going around and I'm sure it makes you curious, well how scummy can this guy be? It's fascinating I assure you! If any you ladies want to know how scummy I really can be, I'd be more than happy to let you know... aim = Kill Damien. Scumbag of the year!
Good Hunting
-Bari Khan

*EDIT: Oh and in regards to that lettuce thing, I don't like it. It's gross. I wrote a Haiku about it.
I hate the outside
Everyone Smells Like Taco Bell
Lettuce, On there faces.


It's wet and gross and looks creepy.

"psycho" is correct. i did not put that link in my post above for a joke.

once upon a time i had this friend, after we hang out one night she tells me about this jewish myth of the perfect partner blah blah blah, i kinda took the hint that she dug me, but did my version of "it ain't me babe", because , among other things, i had a girl (at that point the situation had become long-distance, but still...), and while this chick was smart i was not physicaly attracted to her and in principle i don't discriminate my friends on the basis of looks.

anyway we continued as friends for a while, my long distance situation obviously disintegrated, i was sad & on the rebound she insisted we dated, i said no, but we kept hanging out, taling on the phone, etc.-- eventually that turned into an offer of non-commital sex she made. sort of like helping each other get off.

now, children, this is the time when i tell you if a chick ever offers you the chance to ball her no strings attached, RUN to the nearest exit because it's a lie, it's just a way to get you into the sack and later ensnare you and if she fails then claim that you don't care about her feelings. really. no matter how desperate you are, don't do it. if you are desperate, it's less dangerous to pay a prostitute (provided you wear condoms).

anyway, so i, being the horngoat i am, after much insistence and a bit of drink i said finally ok one day, and though i didn't like her that way, we started sexing on occasion. funny thing is, i started to get depressed, and she started to get more demanding asking me to go with her to parties and that, pretty much trying to turn me into her boyfriend, so after some consideration and about 3 weeks into this situation i told her no can do, this cannot continue, we should have stayed just friends, and maybe we can still do that.

well the amount of RAGE she threw at me during the following year was insane and inordinate. you would have thought i had ran over her puppy on purpose. i had to remain in the vicinity of her due to some work situation, so there was no escape. she tried to sabotage my work, made all sorts of accusations, and even made some public scandals which i avoided for the most part-- but didn't come out unscathed.

this is the horrible thing about these BPDs-- they see everything in black or white and are very prone to rage. they are needy and dependend and impossible to please unless you march in goosesteps at their commands. from being "the coolest greatest person she knew" (i never ate that up, those are exaggerations) i had become satan incarnate and i had soiled her honor & gotten her into sordid situations and taken advantage of her and what not.

oh yes man next time you spot those slash scars in the wrists do yourself a favor and GET THE FUCK OUT OF THERE.

and go back & read that "borderline personality disorder" link. train yourself to spot one. and run.

now if anyone of you reading may suffer from this, i beg you to seek treatment as soon as possible.

I feel you man that sounds just about right. I'm constantly nervous that I've left a door unlocked and she's gonna come by and trash my place.

i've edited my post a bit so please just delete my quote from your post if you can, or people might get confused.

if you areTRULY afraid i suggest you start documenting the harassment so that if it gets to the point where you need a restraining order it's not just a matter of your word against hers. don't be afraid to call the cops, show the vandalism, take pictures, screen caps, etc.

for some reason that defies logic, people tend to side with women on these things, whether they are right or wrong. it's always the fucking little dishonored maid and what not. but if she's stalking & threatening you you have legal recourse to keep her the fuck away.

insane bitch!

I don't like elevator buttons. I'm not "afraid" of them, but they sick me the fuck out.

In the spirit of yr great haiku....

You just picked yr butt
Waiting for the elevator
Now I can't push that



PS: as a Man Who Loves Crazy Chicks, you have my complete sympathy...

did I say I did not LIKE IT?

:P

Cops just left my place, I filed a report about my car getting vandilized. I was nervous cleaning up all the evidence of heavey marijuana use from my apartment.

That should teach the bitch a lesson.

jesus, you guys have some psycho bitches on your hands. i would never do something so fucking crazy. women just need to learn to LET GO.

Crazy ex-girlfriends are no fun, although crazy almost (she was two years older and I was young and didn't have a car, but she still dug me but I wouldn't make a move) girlfriends that pass out drunk on you can be some of the nicest people on the earth.

That's why I am glad I am a queer. Girls are just fucking crazy.

it might be a good idea to, hm, keep things clean for the time being; given that she knows your... habits? she might retaliate by ratting you out. just saying...

if they were to hair test him it wouldn't matter. they do a hair test and you're fucked three ways to tuesday.

yah but for test they'd have to have "probable cause" & all that shit &... unlikely

just saying. worst case scenario.

I'm not really that worried and I feel better now that I filed a report. I need a healthy well adjusted girl. Preppy clean cut type. The one who's never considered cutting them selves.

i dont know about the preppy part but hell yes to the last one.

what was one of "murphy's laws of sex"?

"never have sex with someone crazier than yourself"

ha! ha ha ha ha! (it never works for 1 of the 2)

best wishes.

unless you're equally crazy as who you're fucking.

equally in every way? thats like impossible, unless one's fucking their twin. that wouldn't be just crazy but fucking yucky.

did anyone here watch "deadly ringers" btw?

gotta go now...

Yeah, I'm like 72% sane, I need at least 84% sane back my way.

it was just theoretical. craziness is immeasureable, so the probability of actually finding someone who is as crazy as you in every way is pretty much zero.

just for the record i'm usually the tame one.

people have this crazy misconception of me that i'm like gouging people's eyes out with shotglasses and whatnot.

but yeah he is a bit nuts.