Things are not ok
 

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Unfortunately, I can't help, as I've pretty much felt the same way for at least 6 years now. I just have to keep distracting myself with other things to spend my time on to keep my mind from wandering.... drugs helped me a bit. But I dunno. My life is all about small victories.

At the very least you have a girlfriend though, right? Do you talk to her about that kind of stuff?

This may sound like existential bullshit, but life demands a revolution every so often. Stand up to the monotony and do something about it. I don't know if you have the patience left to wait for a vacation or something but you need to go somewhere you've never been to, meet people you've never met, and do stuff you've never done. Once you've filled up on your life, you can return to your grind from a new perspective.

Thanks, I think more than anything I want to meet people. People that don't like miles away like the ones I know (my school is in the city).

Problem is I have no way of meeting new people. I can't just say "hey" to the girl on the bus or anything like that.

sway was right, find something that would amuse you and make you feel productive.
I mean, get a portable recording device, walk around the countryside, record sounds and make a kickass field recording ambient record. or get an old camera in the pawn shop and try to make some nice pictures.
You know, my life is a routine too. Everyone's life is a routine, pretty much (except crypto's). The thing is, you have to find ways to escape the dullness and make your life a bit more colourful. What I do to escape the 9-to-5 work life plus bore on weekends, is that I make music, I read, I take long trips with my girlfriend, I try to take pictures, I travel whenever I have enough time and money to do so, etc etc.
Life's in your hands, man.
Why don't you find new mates at your school? Why don't you start a band or something?

do something you wouldn't do.

make eyes at a bakery girl.

start running/ get in shape. endorphins make you happy

i was kidding with the crypto part, y'know

dude you live in sydney. so many babes live there.

go to the beach and scout models. find tall hot girls and ask them if they model, if they say no, then make up an agency name

My life sounds a bit similar to yours ZERO, except for the suicide bit, I'm more afraid that one day I'll explode because something will happen and everything will come out at once. I make sure there are things to look forward to, goals, things that make life fun - learning new instruments, learning another language, new Doctor Who episodes, the knowledge that in a few months I'll have found a band that interests me like only a few previously have.

Most of my time is spent either at school, doing work or being lost in my thoughts, and at home composing, listening to music and finding things that interest me. That bit about you not being able to say hello to the girl at school, I'm like that too (I wish I wasn't), which is why I don't really have a lot of friends, but I don't let it bother me anymore.

She doesn't want to talk about this kind of stuff. Also, we've been together 6 years and she still, somehow, doesn't know if I'm the "one" and all this other bullshit that brings even more stress into my life.

work out why you have lost all of your motivation and do something about it... then move to melbourne, sydney bites ass and is the worst most depressing city in australia.

Melbourne has better people, that's true. I feel a bit restricted living with my folks, they're actually really flexible when it comes to going out and stuff, but there's no places around me that make me happy. Where I live is incredibly depressing simply because it is so boring. Everything that was here that used to make me happy as a kid is gone. I hold my childhood very dear because of how blissfully happy I was (and hey, not many kids weren't) but it seems that it was some kind of dream now; my family friends moved out years ago, they tore down the pool I used to swim in, paved over the parks I used to play in, dozed the shopping centre I used to visit every week to help my dad with the shopping etc.

Also I don't have any money. I teach guitar to about 2 people, and all my attempts at advertising my lessons go unnoticed (which is weird, given I charge $15/h). If I had some money maybe I could check out some new music, or save for a holiday, and eventually, move out.

I have my goals set out but the path to them seems to promise more of the same. On top of that, I have a lot of school work to do between now and then. School work that decides weather or not I get a good job.

I really appreciate the advice, all of you. Helps put things into perspective, for sure. I know one day I'll dig through and find this thread and laugh about how much things have changed.

i never finished school, and still got into university when i was 24, between highschool and then i worked in records stores bummed around got hammered every single day... you dont have to decide what you are going to do with your life, life is a very transient thing so don't put so much value on the small things. i grew up in a shitty suburb that had nothing as well but i made the most of it and went to the city 4 or 5 nights a week when i was 15 and onward. granted it was much easier to get into pubs back then. you wont miss highschool at all, i havent seen anyone i went to highschool with in 13 years and that is wonderful, they were all a bunch of tools and teen pregnancies anyway.

it's been said before, but everything becomes a routine at some point. the point is not to give in to that and keep doing new stuff. go away from home and the city you're used to for a while, and you'll feel like a happy jolly newborn full of life.

ok maybe that's a bit too optimistic.

no ploesj you're exactly right. I want to get away from where I've lived all my life, but it will not be soon. There's so much to do between now and then...

As someone who grew up Catholic and who was immersed in ritual, I find routine comforting. If I don't have enough routine, I start to feel a bit nuts. My problem, often, is challenging myself to get out of my comfort zone and try new things. Once I do, I'm glad I did.

But I'll echo what others have said:

1. Find a creative outlet.

2. Get some physical exercise.

Drugs and drinking heavily?

Become a hermit?

as if that would fix anything. You'll be even more lonely then. coffins are sleeps one only.

One thing I've noticed is that teenagers often have a hard time seeing that there's an endpoint to their bad circumstances or depression or whatever. I'd also suggest seeing a doctor and getting on some kind of mild anti-depressant. I went on something mild myself back in January because I felt very "flat," everything very grey and blah. Within weeks I was feeling alive again.

Yeah or consider taking some kind of vitamin-lecithin tonic. It makes you calm and sleepy. Also you kind of tend to do not give a fuck about your shitty situation anymore.

W/ what I'm on, I would still say I give a fuck about a bad situation but I see a larger perspective on it. And I roll with the punches, as they say. Instead of getting upset when something bad happens, I have an easier time staying calm about it so that I can figure something out, or if I realize that I can't do anything about, it's easier to let it go.

Anyway, just saying all this to show Zero there are benefits to going the medication route.

yeah, pills, that will solve it.

things we really want don't just come knocking on the door out of nothing. if you know what you want, fight for it.
have you even talked to your parents about it?
assuming you are somewhat responsible and have normal parents, they are the easiest people to persuade. if you expose them your feelings about this subject in a rational way i don't see how they won't help you.

one of my younger sisters is in the 11th grade and my parents(a conventional catholic couple) pay for her room in a different city.

I know what you mean, I had the same stuff going on in highschool. Everyday was just a routine and classmates seemed to become more and more annoying by the day. School was such I drag I really, really, REALLY hated it and I was having a really crappy "relationship" at the time which made me feel like shit. I didn't really go out much because I felt so (uh I hate to use this word) depressed so I kinda got alienated from my friends outside of school.

I'm afraid that there's nothing much you can do about the highschool thing but you can do something about staying home during the weekends. When you're amongst your buds you'll feel better. That's what helped me eventually. Just hang in there, before you know it you're out of highschool.

^^^ this. hold on to that thought.

ps: you could always play WoW. that's what the rest of us with no life do.

I didn't say it would solve it. Of course, if you want to live in the dark ages and get righteous about living without medicine, that's your right. The Christian Scientists would welcome you.

The most sensible (and true) statement in this thread so far.

You must spread some Runeblades around before giving them to floatingslowly again.

Ha ha! What's sensible and true about it? That it's what people without lives do?

Too funny.

gmku, you've somehow lost your sense humour recently, as it seems.

A guy I live with plays WoW virtually around the clock. He has absolutely no life whatsoever but is easily the happiest, most contented person I've ever met. Any sign of life-related stress he just logs in and kills a few moonkins.

you're right, i think that in cases like this (a teenager with no apparent psychological problem other than shyness and low self-esteem) a medieval approach serves better.

unless i'm not getting this right, and there's something else. then i'd suggest him to seekr a psychologist with the purpose of treatment. medication should be secondary.

some of my best friends are moonchickens. :(

and although I wouldn't say I play it anywhere near "around the clock", it's good for wasting time when there's time to be wasted.

however, if GMKU, in all his wisdom, would like to come up with something else to do in a backwater town (that doesn't involve drinking), I'm open to suggestions!

Sorry, how is medicine medieval? I really don't understand this aversion to medication I run into sometimes. And yet these same kids often will choose to self-medicate with pot and other things. Double standard?

hey Marty McFly

shit be fucked up. sometimes life seems interminable. Morrissey put it correct when he said "life is very long when yr lonely."
I have been there my man. I had years in middle school and high school where I had some friends AT school, but no one after school to do anything with, or hang out, or even listen to RAWK.
it sucks shit, and the no g/f thing sucks shit.
Everything can seem like it will never end, and never change.
that is FALSE though. everything is always different after a while and everything changes. EVERYTHING, whether you actively make the change happen or not.
the trick is to be ACTIVE in making the change happen. don;t let life lead you around.
meeting people is a bitch but all you can do is partake of the things that you like and you will end up naturally around people with those same interests, people with whom you can talk and strike up conversations. trust in yourself, and understand that in life, every person needs to be their own best friend. even with family and friends around, the better part of life is spent in yr own head, with only yrself as company.

maybe set some new goals for yrself, some new hobbies or skills or just things you have interest in doing it could be anything.

the good times will seem ever more sweet and delicious for you having suffered through these lean, sad times, dig? smal consolation, but it is true

Life is suffering. The first noble truth, according to the Buddha.

Chin Up Goth.

Seriously though, there are some aspects of your own personality you cant change, only control. They are often the things that are strongest in you, be it your imperviousness to superficial solutions to serious questions or having high standards about the kind of people you assosciate with.
Its hard striking a balance with people, I tend to know within 10 minutes if someone is going to be a friend or just another person, I dont really feel like im going to be ok in the long term, but this is the only life I have and thats motivation enough for me to carry on.

Man, I can relate to this. I think there's a lot of good advice.

are you aphasiac? where did i wrote that?






because it's not migraines we are talking about, is that so hard to understand?

what double standard?
are you saying that because they already self-medicate that justifies getting medication?

how can anyone with good sense use that argument? if anything, the fact that they are already incurring in substance misuse, indicates that these people are more susceptible of inducing in addictive behaviour, and therefore the use of medication should be avoided.

Peace, brother.

And let's not turn what is supposed to be a thread to help somebody into a protracted argument over whether medication can or should be used to treat depression. Jesus.

I had to look up aphasiac. From aphasia, meaning "loss or impairment of the power to use or comprehend words usu. resulting from a brain lesion."

Far as I know, I haven't had a brain lesion.

that ought to liven things up a bit and make for a really great album, but if you don't want to go to such an extreme, I have no real suggestions.. sorry, no one can avoid दुःख and the first and second Noble Truths..