A brush-up on phonics, shall we?
 

Time to air an anal-retentive pet peeve of mine, which is surely hypocritical, as I am far from faultless.

Let's take a look at our spelling tendencies.

"Weird." NOT "wierd."
"Friend." NOT "freind."

Repeat after me: "'I' before 'e' except after 'c,' or when sounding like 'a' like in 'neighbor' and 'weigh,' or except when a word is 'weird.'"

Yes, those crazy rumors are true: "it's" and "its" are two different words. "They're," "there," and "their" are also not interchangeable. The same applies for "two," "too," and "to," "your," "you're"...well, you get the idea.

There are a number of tiny spelling/grammar issues I could harp on, but the point is, while I can certainly understand typos and misspellings, I firmly believe that errors of the above ilk are due to pure laziness, and should be corrected immediately upon detection. You learned these lessons in grammar school, about the same time you learned it wasn't socially acceptable to wet your pants, and you don't go forgetting that lesson, do you?

Practice some self-discipline, folks! Communication, especially in its written form, is one of the most powerful tools you possess as a human being. The way others perceive you, as well as your formulation of your own mentality, is shaped by the way you express yourself.

The OED is your friend. Get in bed with Roget's. They're here to help you. Hone your vocabulary, so that the next time you pass some uneducated, flea-ridden, plaque-laden transient, you can laugh in derision free from hypocrisy.

yipeeeee!!!!

let me add a few:

"you're" not "your" when it means "you are" (as in "you're practically illiterate")

"separate" not "seperate" in every fucking case

"sense" not "sence"

other pet peeves to follow soon

could have instead of could of.

*runs

^^^ yes yes that one too!

This thread is rediculous

wow. i have a hero.

grammar issues piss me off royally. one of my personal favorites is ending sentences with prepositions . . . i take great pains, even in spoken language, not to transgress those boundaries. "that is a rule of english up with which i WILL put," to paraphrase churchill (and diametrically change his meaning).

i won my school spelling bee twice in middle school, and i once lost at the next level on a word that doesn't exist ("vicosity" was the word given -- presumably he meant "viscosity"). the kid who ended up winning spelled "validity" "velidity" in the first round, but the pronouncer, who was apparently a dumbass, didn't catch it.

eh, i'm easy on the preposition rule you speak of.

some times it's much harder to make a comprehensible sentence by following it. that's a rule we can easily do without. :D

I do hope you're being facetious.

Amyvega, good call, that one drives me MAD!

And, aprogeny79, if I were you, that experience would corrode my soul until the day I died.

Ooh, here's another one that vexes me beyond words: "irregardless."

she sells sheep cells by the seep shore

You know, the worst thing is, I find myself using improper grammar at times because I think I'll be less intelligible if I observe the formal rules. Aprogeny79's example of ending sentences with propositions is a good example of that. I also do that with pronouns - for example:

(This is random, mind you, I don't have any violent tendencies. At the moment.)
"If I saw an intruder in my home, I'd shoot them."

NO.

"If I saw an intruder in my home, I'd shoot him/her."

or

"If I saw an intruder in my home, I'd shoot him."
(PC bullshit aside, the grammar bible allows one to use the male pronoun when generalizing in a sentence like the above.)

However, I tend to just use the plural generalization, because it seems 'easier' and more 'universal.' I suppose that makes me partly responsible in perpetuating such crimes.

Aprogeny79, I hate typing numbers in names, so I'm going to call you Huey, if you don't mind.

the "your"/"you're" one drives me up a fucking wall. people have got to know better!

just use "yr" and don't worry your pretty head

eh.... the "they" is acceptable as a singular pronoun when the gender is not specified--- i forget in what manual i read this. i use it every now and then.

oh and if it's not "official", it should be accepted

one of the great things about the english language is that there's no "academy" attempting to regulate its use, and therefore it can evolve faster.

It makes me wonder what people are doing when they diculous and why they would want to do it again.

Not pretty.

"Them" is beginning to be a recognized gender neutral term for "him/her" or "s/he." It's only a matter of time.

They're
There
Their

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, PLEASE LEARN THE CORRECT CONTEXTS FOR THESE WORDS!!!!
Also, misplaced apostrophes give me the angries.

Ha.....I'd like to add that if you start a thread than for Christ's sake spell it right or I will fail you!! This happens EVERYDAY! Thank you for yr generosity.

In this context, "Every Day" is a two-word phrase.

"Happens every day" is different than "Everyday people."


"Than" would be "then" in this context as well.
Sayin'.

Ooh I second that!

I could be mistaken, but I thought that according to the MLA, it was generally frowned upon to use the plural as a gender neutral term. You see what college does for you? Dick (I don't mean that literally).

Stirling, I breathe a sigh of relief. I didn't think you were the type, and now I feel affirmed in my belief. One never does know, however.

I'd like to note that there is a difference, even if it is subtle, between abbreviations or grammatical relaxations in the interests of expediting communication or writing in an informal setting, and basic grammar fucktardedness.

Like that there, see? I know 'fucktardedness' isn't a word. YOU know 'fucktardedness' isn't a word. It expresses the proper sentiment, however, and I'm smart-like 'n that, so YOU know that I know better (that was tongue in cheek for the record, but you catch my drift).

Yeeahhhh, you take that beotch to SKOOL yo

You see what I did there? Dual reference? Eh? Eh?

MLA still doesn't dig it, but the winds are a-blowin'.

I also predict "whom" will exit common usage sometime in the coming decades.

This thread rocks.

Yeah my English degree means nothing......not that you study that kind of shit anyway.

I was an English major too!
It's true.

I was just having fun, seeing as it's a nitpick thread. Please, take no offense.

Ha, yeah I know man. I'm usually pretty on point with stuff like than vs then their vs there etc. I graduated in Aug. and I still haven't found a decent job yet.

I just remembered my favorite from some other board:

"your retarted"

I personally DO mean to offend. Be offended, for you flouters of grammar and spelling ARE offenders! You should be ASHAMED that you are wasting the knowledge that has been bestowed upon you!

I don't care if "whom" is phased out, I will still look disdainfully upon those who fail to use it in the appropriate context.

*Actually, I suspect I still fuck that one up on occasion.

I like "whom" though. It sounds so posh and pretentious. Better than sounding retarted.

hah hah, that's funny-- you ARE catholic after all, aren't you? ;)

What??? Like I said, you don't learn that crap in college (I didn't). Everyone is an offender at some point.

I didn't mean that I meant to offend you in particular. Well, I sort of did, but not really haha

No !@#$%!, I'm not a Catholic, I'm just a sanctimonious, tyrannical asshole. Oh, wait...

JOKING

Ha ha...no you didn't offend me.

oh fuck, i almost forgot

"noone" for "no one" - doesn't peeve me it's just wrong

there was this cool boardie called himself noonproductions

he meant nobody we thought it was 12pm

it was not his fault, he's belgian, so he learned from what he saw

"noone" sounds like the time
a "nooner" is a lunchtime quickie (well you could have a long lunch too...)

you can put a dash or a space: no-one or no one if you mean "nobody"

The English language is a fine tool - you'll find it serves you much better if you use it properly.

My pet hate (like many) is apostrophes heaving their way in when they have no business being there at all. English greengrocers are particularly prone to the use of wild apostrophes.

Having said that, I don't really mind the preposition thing at all. I also would ask everyone to bear in mind that, despite what some might claim, there has always been an element of choice in the split infinitive 'rule'.

haha, that's funny! :D
english isn't my first language and i actually "learned" from reading this very board that this was supposedly correct grammar in english. i hadn't seen it used before... shows what the internet can do to the innocent reader!

some spelling and grammar errors can annoy me, but mostly when they're made in my own language and especially when they're written on paper. they just look incredibly dumb in official letters. in english, i'm sure i make plenty of errors myself and as an outsider i'm not even always aware of the differences between english and american-english spelling.


edit
"could of/could have", "your/you're", "there/their" are my main pet peeves.

i sometimes catch myself on mixing up "then/than" and "to/too", but i know how they're supposed to be used so when that happens it's just from typing too quickly. i always edit then.

I will dish out no criticism to non-native speakers. The way I see it, you've come this far and I know nothing of your language save a few words. I had no idea where you were from for a long time; I assumed English was your first language when I first joined the board.
Anyone who learns my language so I don't have to learn theirs get huge points in my book, and as long as I can understand him/her (see how I did that? The him/her construction is OK for text, but so awkward in speech that I think "they" or "them" will take over in the official lexicon sooner than later) will get no nitpicking from me.

Truncated will probably still give you a hard time though; she is brutal!

yes, she seems in full war mode... i don't expect much compasion from her! :D

i used to write he/she correctly though until this board disinformed me. i shall kick the habit at once. hopefully truncated will be pleased.

Eminently sensible words, Savage Clone.

But I would like to add that language changes naturally, through use and re-use - for example, it's highly likely that everyone on this board now uses slang terms that didn't exist in that sense even five or ten years ago. Are new words/uses for words always bad? Not neccessarily, in my opinion, and we should not be too quick to denounce modern changes whilst we use and even celebrate developments of the past. To use an extreme example, Shakespeare gave us something like 1800 new words! Many of them are still very common everyday words that we all use: critical, gloomy, accomodation, road and lonely are five that spring to mind. He also shoved words together to make new phrases eg pitched battle, mind's eye, foregone conclusion, heart of gold.

edit: I'm 100%! Splendid!




lcc

There is no pleasing her. She is as unforgiving as an old-school comic book supervillain.

this thread is awesome. i'd just like to add that "lose" and "loose" are two different words, as it tends to really annoy me when people mix those up. but i'm sure my grammar isn't the best either, so i'll hide away again now after this little post.

oh and for some reason i like to type everything in lower case, despite this being grammatically incorrect.

Truncated, i think i'll give you some rep points for this thread, unless you don't want them.

I'm studying English at the moment and i need a lot of practice to master it. I still make a lot of mistakes, mostly grammatical ones, but fortunately i've made a huge progress in learning grammar rules etc. and posting on this board really helps me in developing my language skills. :)

Yeah, Lose and Loose being mixed up drives me crazy as well as the whole their, there, they're thing.

I happen to read a fair of email correspondence and letters written by people with well paid jobs in the crap job I have and you'd be shocked by the standard of grammar and spelling. Terrible....and people sending CVs in and covering letters are even worse....how do you expect to get a job if you can't even spell properly in a letter that you really should check quite thoroughly before sending. I think I might have actually kept a few examples in my drawer (yeah, I'm that sad) they were that bad. One guy actually sent in a CV with absolutely no details of previous education....I'm no CV expert but that doen't seem sensible.