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i am not going to pretend i care about your uncle or anything. i dont know if this is what you were intending by that but if you are claiming people should stay alive out of fear of hurting others then you are condemning them to a guilt trap that can only produce misery. if you are saying people should think "it is my duty to stay alive to not burden others with the misery of my death" then this is a recipe for disaster. noone should accept this hypothetical imposition of moral standards. because to try and hold up superstitions simply for the fact you are supposed to out of some guilt trip blackmail is no foundation for a psychologically balanced life. the problem lies in the assumptions of what life is supposed to be, and your application of assumptions onto others. you talk about how all these people have "never been the same", well that is there problem. not the person who killed themselves. it sounds more like they are just nostalgic for the way things were for THEM before the person killed themselves. yet in a way this is selfish because altho they all may have felt better the person who committed suicide obviously didn't. the problem is they are basing their perception of his life and their past social interaction with a manifestation of what his inner pyschic life was like. this is of course all we can ever do as human beings, its a limit in what our thought processes can accomplish, and it can drive some to depression. the sensible attitude is to learn to deal with it, not get depressed and then try to warn others to take suicide more seriously because of the suffering it causes. this is a tactic that is just not good enough to work.
probably they are confused aswell and frightened because they have to deal with their own self perception and fear of death. when someone commits suicide those that bear witness to it are left with the appalling conclusion that no matter what facade of bio security they can erect to shield themselves from the inevitability of death, for that person who died it obviously didn't matter. then they are stuck wondering "well if only the conclusions and inner life that keeps me going could have been somehow shared with this person." well it couldnt have, it it could have happened it would but it didn't. there is nothing else to do but deal with this fact. in trying to think of "reasons" they could have given the person to stay alive, they are are forced into having to apply those own reasons to their own will to live, and of course they can rarely ever measure up, and this is quite distressing.
its not a matter of simply applying a sort of mock seriousness to the subject "ohhhh, don't make fun of suicide, it really hurts people you know!" this isn't good enough, and in this attitude i find problems.
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