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I have recently found myself slipping into old bad habits since I am laying off of narcs. I actually am going bulemic again for the first time in 15 years. I cannot stand the thought of my stomach being full. I relish hunger pains. It means I am doing good on my diet, which consists of a peice of cheese a few times a day and some liqour. I have binged a few times and HAD TO THROW UP. I could not take it!!!!!! I am trying to get back into my excersize routine. This is very hard because of my schedule. I need cardio. This is also a result of my disorders. I feel I must work off every calorie in my system and that my metabolism is going to slow down. All I can think about all day is how the pants I just bought are tight. I am deathly scared of gaining weight. I am only 129lbs, but I want to loose more. I am now chugging water trying to flush fat cells out of my system.
Just wondering if anyone else has dealt with this before.
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