[Norma J]

In the future, probably acouple of years from now, you'll miss these times (...maybe). I mean, I sounded rather similar to you a few years ago (except for the hating of my parents but I rarely spoke to my family even though living in the same house). I was a recluse. I could never find anyone I liked anymore than a one night stand. And all I cared about was art and felt that alientated me from most of society. Now, I have been in a serious relationship for over 2 years, I still feel the same about art but I now see it as unattainable unlike when I was younger and would see it as a possibility/dream. And I'm older and I don't see life the same anymore, it feels as though life is passing/has passed me by. I am alittle envious of the youth, to have that fire in the belly taht I once had, that "I'm gonna be an artist no matter what. One day I'll make it, you wait and see", as opposed to now "You don't always get what you want in life" outlook. I mean, I make it through the days and I'm relatively a happy dude, but there always feels like there's something missing these days and that my days are numbered. I guess I'm just insatiable. And I'm only 24. I think what always got me through was the thought of better tomorrows, but now I don't even see tomorrow.

Oh, well, I don't know where I was going with that, so I'll quit jibbering now.