[!@#$%!]

yeah but depression induces self-destructive, self-sabotaging behavior-- fights with the boss at the night job, getting fired, getting jobs for which you're overqualified (which further depress you), etc.

i was also diagnosed with chronic depression once upon a time but 7 years of therapy cured me of that. the antidepressants were temporary crutches while i got better-- i was prescribed twice, and i was weaned off those within months.

anyway, there are decent doctors out there who will offer sliding scale fees, barter, etc.-- i know someone who used to pay with paintings. i had some debt with my shrink that i paid off by making videos.

your no exit/no solution outlook is in fact a symptom of the depression. you can always make excuses for not trying to get better, and maintain the status quo, but eventually it will come back to bite you in the ass. the longer you wait, the bigger the bite. simple fact.

anyway, best wishes to you.