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Old 05.24.2006, 11:38 AM   #1
SpectralJulianIsNotDead
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SpectralJulianIsNotDead kicks all y'all's assesSpectralJulianIsNotDead kicks all y'all's assesSpectralJulianIsNotDead kicks all y'all's assesSpectralJulianIsNotDead kicks all y'all's assesSpectralJulianIsNotDead kicks all y'all's assesSpectralJulianIsNotDead kicks all y'all's assesSpectralJulianIsNotDead kicks all y'all's assesSpectralJulianIsNotDead kicks all y'all's assesSpectralJulianIsNotDead kicks all y'all's assesSpectralJulianIsNotDead kicks all y'all's assesSpectralJulianIsNotDead kicks all y'all's asses
These are pickup lines that I have used, guaranteed not to work.

  • Hi
  • Hey
  • Hi, my name is Julian.
  • (in response to "I like your velvet underground t-shirt") Yeah, they are ok.
  • (in response to "I like your beard/hair/something") Oh really? I just haven't shaved in awhile/ brushed my hair today.
  • (in response to "my boyfriend bla bla bla") Oh, he sounds like a nice guy.
  • (in response to "do you smoke?") No, I've got terrible lungs, don't want to fuck em up more.
  • (in response to an offer to fetch me another drink) No, I've had enough, I don't really want to get drunk tonight.
  • (seeing a girl miraculously sitting on my bed) Hey, lets find out if there are any parties going on tonight.
  • (in response to "I love your Don Cab shirt") *insert anything here about having indie connections*
  • (in response to "I think you are a good guitar player/singer") I'm not really at my best today/I'm not techincally that good/I hate my voice
  • (in response to "Why do all my guy friends fall for me?") I don't know, guys are stupid.
  • Any honest question masked as a joke
  • Blatantly telling a girl how you feel towards them
That is all I can think of for now. NO, these were not all used on the same woman.
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