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When I was growing up, NY (more specifically Manhattan) seemed like the most exciting place in the world. It was where Spiderman lived and King Kong went on the rampage. I learnt the names of all the districts as a kid by watching films like The Warriors and listening to Grandmaster Flash records. I imagined that every person in the city looked like either Travis Bickle, a Warhol superstar or Eric B. Even watching TV shows like Taxi fuelled my obsession with the city. I'm sure a large part of why Sonic Youth meant so much to me at that time was as much to do with their being from NY as it was their music. I remember finally getting there and stumbling across Eldridge St and getting this weird thrill of finally seeing a place I'd once fantasised about.
I was brought up in the arse end of East London, where absolutely nothing was happening whatsoever at the time - and isn't still to this day. NY became this mythical place for me. I read an interview with Antony from Antony and the Johnsons recently where he said that finally arriving in NY after years of obsessing over it, he felt like he made sense. This is exactly how I felt when i stepped off the bus at Grand Central Station. It's very hard to describe, but all I can say is that I felt totally at ease with myself, maybe for the first time in my life. In sexual terms it's like I 'came out', only to have to get back into the closet on my return to London.
I know this all sounds rather melodramatic, and it probably is, but it's probably the most honest thing I've ever posted here, so fuck it.
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