[thindarkduke13]

My short story. DOn't steal it, fuckers!

"Are you done in there?" Carl rapped at the bathroom door and whined, "I’m lonely."
"Aren’t we all?" Suzie quipped, "I know sweetie. Almost done here. Be a doll and get me a drink please?" with all the sarcastic yearning on "please". Carl didn’t answer and walked to the kitchen to pull out some bottles he put away five minutes ago. He paid no attention to the brand names and labels and poured based on color. He tried it and grimaced. Still, it was alcohol; greedily he drank some more, walked back to the family room and stretched out on the couch. Suzie emerged grinning.
"You’re very smiley. What did you do?" Carl suspiciously asked.
"How do you know I did something? I could just be happy."
"My son is all teeth when he’s guilty as sin; nothing serious, just stealing and hiding something of ours." Suzie fell onto the couch, almost on top of him and replied innocently.
"I never took anything."
"Not this time."
"What do you mean?"
"You really thought I wouldn’t notice you wearing my wife’s shoes? She grounded our son because she figured he did something with them." Suzie’s face drooped.
"I feel terrible, Carl. Poor thing. Well, it’s a good thing I wore them today. I’ll just put ‘em away now. Tell your wife you found them, I don’t know. Someplace weird."
"I’ll think of something."
"Ya know, from what I’ve heard, she’s kind of a bitch." Carl’s face twisted in offence, but softened to a stern expression.
"She is not a bitch. She’s very sweet and I love her."
"Then why am I here?" An offended Suzie demanded.
"Because you’re fun."
"She’s not?"
"A different kind. You’re outgoing, sociable. Like me. She’s quiet and sometimes she says I can irritate her. You know, with my 'loudness'."
"If we have so much in common, why didn’t you marry me?"
"Well, I didn’t know you then. And two, I’m in politics. Politicians marry Jackie, not Marilyn." Suzie crept off the couch to her feet to look down upon him.
"I’m not classy enough for you?"
"I wasn’t that harsh. Besides you don’t even like politics. It drives you crazy. You said it yourself!"
"I know, it just upset me that you think I wouldn’t be respectable to be seen with. But you’re right, I would hate it. I’ll go and put these shoes back." Suzie twirled and walked to the back of the house. Carl sat staring, wondering whether he made a mistake bringing Suzie to his home, to his life. Weighing the outcomes of breaking up with her, he took a gulp of the drink Suzie ignored.
Suzie emerged grinning. Modeling his wife’s red dress, shoes and tight bun hair, she strutted down the hallway to the family room. Carl sat staring.
"Jesus Christ."
"Guess who I am." Suzie cooed. Carl pushed himself off the couch to be face to face with her.
"Suzie, this is not normal. Go put these back," He glanced at the wall clock. "Damn! She’ll be home any second. Hurry up!"
"Who will be home? I’m your wife. Do you have another woman in your life?" She jealously demanded.
"I’m warning you. Put the clothes back."
"They’re mine!" Carl’s hand flew and made contact with Suzie’s face with a crack. She stood stoically erect, the tears welling up belying her defiant stance. Unnerved, Carl began stammering.
"I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I just lost…" The garage door opened. "Damn. Please Suzie. I’ll call you. You parked across the street, right?" Suzie nodded. "OK, the back door will be closest."
"What about the clothes?"
"She never wears that. Just go, I’ll think of something." Suzie walked to the back door as Carl rushed to meet his wife at the front; she opened the door just as he did. She heard his warm welcome and his wife's loving responses and how he repeated her name in their talk. She slammed the door and listened. Suzie heard a "What was that?" and strutted back to the family room.