For the vast majority of my life I was majorly depressed. I was on tons of medications, which all served to be just about as sucessful as I was functional....Somehow I managed to get my life together. I think it's because I started allowing myself to be angry rather than self-deprecating. This sounds kinda crazy but discovering Sonic Youth when I was a junior in high school became kind of a turning point in my life. I had never felt so connected to a piece of music. Listening to EJSTNS was kinda a moment that shook me up and really took me some place. It made me want to live kinda. Even if just for a moment. I started getting stoned and riding my bike to that album. It was the singular experience that I actually looked forward too.
But yeah, anyway, now I'm actually doing pretty well. In fact, I kinda like (love) life. I smile a lot. I think I'm happy. It's kinda scary.
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