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Old 08.13.2006, 03:18 AM   #1
youthoftomorrow
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so, i work in the games department at a theme park. i'm usually at a game called "Battlezone." the concept of the game is fairly simple: you buy buckets of rubber balls and shoot them from pressurized air guns at fiberglass boats from the side of a caged pool (you can also pay to get in the boats).

anyway, six of us were working there today (which is more than usual, but it's a Saturday). we had just finished closing it for the night and were waiting for our manager to come down and escort us to the arcade (where the games department is centered; he needs to escort us because each of us has several hundred dollars inside our till bags). he was running late, so we were sitting around the Battlezone booth (which holds the ball bin and the register), talking. DJ, the "lead" employee at Battlezone, was getting really bored, so he decided to get on the booth's roof (which is out of character for him, being the responsible, trustworthy employee that he is). he started walking around on the roof's edge (which juts out over the counter a few feet). this is a highly unsafe thing to do seeing as it's basically a few pieces of sheet metal supported by a few old 2x4s and some screws. we could hear the wood creaking and see that the entire roof was sagging because of DJ. my coworker, Cody, turned to me and said something to the effect of "wouldn't it be hilarious if he fucking fell?" this proved rather prophetic. another coworker of mine, my friend Brad, walked under DJ and started smiling.

Brad is the quiet, introspective type, and it's taken a few months for him to get comfortable with joking around with us. that fact made his next action all the more hilarious to the rest of us (excluding DJ): Brad yanked on DJ's dangling leg as hard as he could. the part of roof that DJ was sitting on collapsed and he tumbled to the asphalt. he wasn't hurt but the section of roof he had been sitting on was hanging from the building by a only few nails. everyone (including DJ) started laughing. after a few minutes, we realized how much shit we could all get in if we didn't think of an alibi.

so, we propped the roof up as best we could with what we had available (a net we use to scoop balls out of the pool) and started debating our best course of action. at first we thought we could just turn the lights off and go to meet our manager further down the path. then, after we had signed out, someone would have to jump the fence and pull the net away, making it appear that it had happened after we had left. we nixed that idea because it just seemed too risky. we settled on lying. we told our manager (when he finally arrived) that some little punk had decided to attempt a running chin-up and had failed. we're fairly certain he believed us (both Steven and i are quite skilled at executing this type of thing). this was the only time i've ever heard him swear (he muttered "Shit," while examining the roof). we joked with him the entire way back to the arcade, making it seem like business as usual (because an uncomfortable silence would be a dead give-away).

on my drive home, i realized that it's entirely possible that there are cameras covering that part of the path and we could be in some major shit, but decided not to worry about it (because i won't be the one who gets fired).
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Old 08.13.2006, 03:23 AM   #2
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hah
that's rich
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Old 08.13.2006, 03:26 AM   #3
Пятхъдесят Шест
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What if they decide to fire all of you based on the fact they can't determine who is really responsible for it?

But that is funny.
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Old 08.13.2006, 03:28 AM   #4
youthoftomorrow
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Пятхъдесят Шест
What if they decide to fire all of you based on the fact they can't determine who is really responsible for it?

they won't fire all six of us. the department is hurting for more employees as it is.
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Old 08.13.2006, 10:49 AM   #5
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good story!
Yesterday at the go-kart track there was a board loose and cracked. It was nearly broken.
Corey, another employee came up and said "Were about to break this board, you're not gonna say anything are you? Last Wednsday the mechanic around the track quit. So if that board were to break the track would be closed down till the next day and everyone would get sent home and live happily ever after
So, we decided to go up to it break it ourselfs. Armed with a hammer, i started beating the shit out of it. But about 3 hits into it. I BROKE THE HAMMER. It was like a normal hammer like this:
 

fuckin crazy i dont know how that happend. Anyway, we tried doing a bunch of different stuff to break the board so everyone could go home. We tried standing on it, jumping on it ect. But, it never broke.
So we ended up staying for the rest of the night, and the board never broke.
(not nearly as cool as youthoftommorow, but it though i'd share)
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Old 08.13.2006, 01:29 PM   #6
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Good story.
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