[ann ashtray]

So, I got my check cashed today, and on my way home I swung by the grocery store to pick up a few items. Just the basic necessities to get me through the week, Diet Coke and Ramen.

Anyways, I'm at the check out aisle and there's one woman in front of me. She's maybe 45ish + clearly doing her grocery shopping for the month as she has loads of items, and while they are being bagged away she keeps giving me these odd looks. It goes on and on and she can tell I'm getting a bit nervous so eventually she says to me "hey, I'm sorry, but you just look exactly like my dead son". She goes as far as to pull a photo of him from her purse. I see no resemblance between me and the deceased, but I feel bad for her anyway.

She requests a favor from me. Says she never got to tell her son goodbye, so would I mind saying "goodbye mom" as she walks off. "Sure" I say...feeling odd about it, obviously, but what else am I supposed to do???

As she begins rolling her buggy full of grocery items away, I say "goodbye mom". She stops, turns around, and replies "goodbye, son". I then proceed to walk the three steps to the cashier to pay for my own stuff, and he says "that will be $367 dollars and some odd change I can't recall. I say "what the heck man, for Diet soda and Ramen? He then tells me my supposed "mom" said I'd be paying for her groceries as well. FUCK THAT! I then chased her to the parking lot and grabbed onto her legs, pulling them....just like I pulled all of yours.

[atsonicpark]

Originally Posted by ann ashtray

So, I got my check cashed today, and on my way home I swung by the grocery store to pick up a few items. Just the basic necessities to get me through the week, Diet Coke and Ramen.

Anyways, I'm at the check out aisle and there's one woman in front of me. She's maybe 45ish + clearly doing her grocery shopping for the month as she has loads of items, and while they are being bagged away she keeps giving me these odd looks. It goes on and on and she can tell I'm getting a bit nervous so eventually she says to me "hey, I'm sorry, but you just look exactly like my dead son". She goes as far as to pull a photo of him from her purse. I see no resemblance between me and the deceased, but I feel bad for her anyway.

She requests a favor from me. Says she never got to tell her son goodbye, so would I mind saying "goodbye mom" as she walks off. "Sure" I say...feeling odd about it, obviously, but what else am I supposed to do???

As she begins rolling her buggy full of grocery items away, I say "goodbye mom". She stops, turns around, and replies "goodbye, son". I then proceed to walk the three steps to the cashier to pay for my own stuff, and he says "that will be $367 dollars and some odd change I can't recall. I say "what the heck man, for Diet soda and Ramen? He then tells me my supposed "mom" said I'd be paying for her groceries as well. FUCK THAT! I then chased her to the parking lot and grabbed onto her legs, pulling them....just like I pulled all of yours.

So, I got my check cashed today, and on my way home I swung by the grocery store to pick up a few items. Just the basic necessities to get me through the week, Diet Coke and Ramen.

Anyways, I'm at the check out aisle and there's one woman in front of me. She's maybe 45ish + clearly doing her grocery shopping for the month as she has loads of items, and while they are being bagged away she keeps giving me these odd looks. It goes on and on and she can tell I'm getting a bit nervous so eventually she says to me "hey, I'm sorry, but you just look exactly like my dead son". She goes as far as to pull a photo of him from her purse. I see no resemblance between me and the deceased, but I feel bad for her anyway.

She requests a favor from me. Says she never got to tell her son goodbye, so would I mind saying "goodbye mom" as she walks off. "Sure" I say...feeling odd about it, obviously, but what else am I supposed to do???

As she begins rolling her buggy full of grocery items away, I say "goodbye mom". She stops, turns around, and replies "goodbye, son". I then proceed to walk the three steps to the cashier to pay for my own stuff, and he says "that will be $367 dollars and some odd change I can't recall. I say "what the heck man, for Diet soda and Ramen? He then tells me my supposed "mom" said I'd be paying for her groceries as well. FUCK THAT! I then chased her to the parking lot and grabbed onto her legs, pulling them....just like I pulled all of yours.

[jon boy]

so i went to the store and...yawn.

[space]

this is why you should sign up for direct deposits.

[DeadDiscoDildo]

My stories better. And real. I just met Van Dyke Parks tonight! I gave him my bands CD and he gave me his card haha. He was drunk off wine and about to play and gave me a side hug and grabbed my side and was like you know I used to be a brunette once.

Hahaha!

This really happened.

[Keeping It Simple]

It's spelt "cheque".

[nicfit]

Originally Posted by Keeping It Simple

It's spelt "cheque".

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cheque

[ploesj]

haha!

(both for you and for keeping it simple messing up)

[pbradley]

 

[knox]

Originally Posted by space

this is why you should sign up for direct deposits.

isn't that mandatory?
god i fucking hate cheques (or checks)
they are evil.

[noisereductions]

that's funny. The other day I rear-ended this car in front of me. His door swung angrily open and a freakin' dwarf got out and stormed over to my window. He yelled "I'M NOT HAPPY!!" to which I replied, "oh... then which one are you?"

[noisereductions]

ps, yr a bastard sway. I believed yr story.

[Rob Instigator]

I needed a shaggy dog tale.....

that was funny

I believed it

but I thought maybe she wanted to have you go thirdknucle deep in her brown eye....

[cryptowonderdruginvogue]

tl;dr

[ann ashtray]

Originally Posted by noisereductions

that's funny. The other day I rear-ended this car in front of me. His door swung angrily open and a freakin' dwarf got out and stormed over to my window. He yelled "I'M NOT HAPPY!!" to which I replied, "oh... then which one are you?"

LOL

[evollove]

Tom Waits told the story better on the third disc of his Orphans set.

[knox]

what a shit story.
except it happened to me once, minus the money part.
just the you look like my dead daughter bit, and a lot of awkward silence.

[jon boy]

last night on the train a bi polar drug addict ran the entire length of the carriage for the entire journey and started shouting 'don't touch my stuff, don't touch my stuff' then tried to lap dance in some poor guys face while he was on the phone to his wife. then i went and drank in a park. thats a story from last night.

[DeadDiscoDildo]

I really met van dyke parks, you assholes.

Oh well, he aint thurston I guess

[Keeping It Simple]

Originally Posted by nicfit

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cheque

Only Americans would spell a word pertaining to something completely different just to distance itself from it's British past.