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Old 04.21.2011, 09:57 AM   #1
SONIC GAIL
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I have recently found myself slipping into old bad habits since I am laying off of narcs. I actually am going bulemic again for the first time in 15 years. I cannot stand the thought of my stomach being full. I relish hunger pains. It means I am doing good on my diet, which consists of a peice of cheese a few times a day and some liqour. I have binged a few times and HAD TO THROW UP. I could not take it!!!!!! I am trying to get back into my excersize routine. This is very hard because of my schedule. I need cardio. This is also a result of my disorders. I feel I must work off every calorie in my system and that my metabolism is going to slow down. All I can think about all day is how the pants I just bought are tight. I am deathly scared of gaining weight. I am only 129lbs, but I want to loose more. I am now chugging water trying to flush fat cells out of my system.

Just wondering if anyone else has dealt with this before.
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Old 04.21.2011, 10:14 AM   #2
floatingslowly
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the only sure and healthy way to lose weight will be exercise. trust me, I know finding time to do it is difficult. I personally could use an extra 5 hours in a day, but sometimes you just have to make time. it sounds as if YOU should make it the most important time of your day.

starving yourself will be the surest way to slow your metabolism! don't fool yourself into thinking otherwise.

if I don't treadmill for at least 45 minutes a day, I feel like shit. if I stop completely, I'd balloon up. baby, on the otherhand, has the metabolism of a hummingbird and could eat vats of raw lard and giggle her way into her miniskirt.

make fucking time. feel good about positive result.

or...keep fingering the back of your throat...feel like shit...lose your hair and teeth and ultimately get nowhere.
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Old 04.21.2011, 10:29 AM   #3
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thanx floats. I have a spinning cycle but the damn kids broke the tension. I lost 100 lbs in the past from exercising. I think it is a mental control thing too.Constant battle since I was 6.
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Old 04.21.2011, 10:30 AM   #4
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Oh yeah I stopped the puking before cause my hair started falling out.
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Old 04.21.2011, 10:48 AM   #5
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I have acid reflux, which makes my food, for a lack of a better term, "Come back up" 60-80 times a day. This doesn't necessarily entail projectile vomit, it's hard to explain. Basically, imagine swallowing something and as soon as it goes down, it comes up. This happens to me all the time, so I hae to keep swallowing and swallowing and swallowing. Haha.

My ex had bullemia for 8 years. That was really difficult to deal with, for both of us to deal with. Because it brought out so many insecurities in her that she took out on me.... I did everything I can to make her happy but she had such a negative, fucked up viewpoint on herself and others.
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Old 04.21.2011, 10:52 AM   #6
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Gail, don't fall for the easy trap of convience (again).

just. fucking. do. it.

computerland will turn us all into jiggly sloths if you let it.
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Old 04.21.2011, 11:04 AM   #7
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I used to be bulimic/sorta-kinda have the same thing that ASP is talking about. Anything I would eat would come back up on me, even something as basic as a sandwich. My stomach would feel so rotten that I would absolutely need to throw it up.

I haven't thrown up because of this in a very long while though. I've been very careful with my diet lately, and consume 80% sugary breakfast cereals. All the milk really settles my stomach.

I do have extremely sensitive teeth now though, probably because of all the puke, and have to use Sensodyne toothpaste just so I can eat without feeling like I have broken glass in my mouth. I'm also prematurely losing my hair, which could also be genetic or stress related as well... so who knows.

Oh well.... at least I got a sweet movie idea out of it!
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Old 04.21.2011, 11:09 AM   #8
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^ yeah, the teeth thing. all my teeth that can be filled have been filled, some grinded down, some capped, etc. i have no enamel on most of my teeth so anything too cold fucks with em. hah.
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Old 04.21.2011, 11:09 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by floatingslowly
Gail, don't fall for the easy trap of convience (again).

just. fucking. do. it.

computerland will turn us all into jiggly sloths if you let it.

Yes it's this fucking PC that is pushing me backwards. I would work out hardcore 2 hours a day before I started working again. Then I would get up at 5 and go to the gym when I started working. Then the OT was so much I would'nt wake up on time. It is no exuse. That is why I started this thread yall motivate me
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Old 04.21.2011, 11:11 AM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by atsonicpark
I have acid reflux, which makes my food, for a lack of a better term, "Come back up" 60-80 times a day. This doesn't necessarily entail projectile vomit, it's hard to explain. Basically, imagine swallowing something and as soon as it goes down, it comes up. This happens to me all the time, so I hae to keep swallowing and swallowing and swallowing. Haha.

My ex had bullemia for 8 years. That was really difficult to deal with, for both of us to deal with. Because it brought out so many insecurities in her that she took out on me.... I did everything I can to make her happy but she had such a negative, fucked up viewpoint on herself and others.

My husband has the acid reflux puke prob. I can understand that fully. I try not to talk about my insecurities cause it just annoys ppl. I am actually quite confident. I just worry about gaining the weight back constantly.
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Old 04.21.2011, 11:12 AM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by atsonicpark
^ yeah, the teeth thing. all my teeth that can be filled have been filled, some grinded down, some capped, etc. i have no enamel on most of my teeth so anything too cold fucks with em. hah.

Yes i spent $7,000 getting my teeth back to normal after my first Bulemia spell. One of the reasons I quit doing it for so long.
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Old 04.21.2011, 11:18 AM   #12
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don't work out so hardcore that you burn yourself out. that's almost just as bad.

and as far as your broken equipment at home goes...that's another excuse. it's almost sumbertiem. walk around the block. get in your car and measure out a distance so you can keep track of progress and make fucking time.
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Old 04.21.2011, 11:23 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SONIC GAIL
Yes i spent $7,000 getting my teeth back to normal after my first Bulemia spell. One of the reasons I quit doing it for so long.
how much time does it take to earn $7000? what if you spent that time walking instead?

maybe focusing on the time-cost of not working out will help you better see the value.
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Old 04.21.2011, 11:28 AM   #14
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Quote:
Originally Posted by floatingslowly
don't work out so hardcore that you burn yourself out. that's almost just as bad.

and as far as your broken equipment at home goes...that's another excuse. it's almost sumbertiem. walk around the block. get in your car and measure out a distance so you can keep track of progress and make fucking time.

I actually ended up just gaining more muscle instead of losing more fat. I could kick some ass though.

I am going to see if there is a warranty on that spinner TODAY and get it fixed. I have only been asking Ryan to fix it for me for a year now. I suggested that I was going running or walking early in the AM before work and he vetoed that idea. We live on a dirt rd so it is actually safer. He just wants to cuddle until 6:00 and seems irritated when I get up early to work out. But fuck that shit if he wants me to be healthy he needs to chill or at least help.
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Old 04.21.2011, 11:29 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by floatingslowly
how much time does it take to earn $7000? what if you spent that time walking instead?

maybe focusing on the time-cost of not working out will help you better see the value.


Godd motivational thought I will definitly keep that one in my head.
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Old 04.21.2011, 11:47 AM   #16
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I eat whenever I'm hungry.
The TV often tells me that it's wrong.
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Old 04.21.2011, 01:14 PM   #17
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nefeli
also, i read somewhere in some blablabla study, that between the people who were fixated on the thought that they wont lose any weight and those who were more relaxed about it, with the same diet, obviously, the 2nd group lost weight. the 1st simply didnt.


edit.
also i have seen your pictures and you look great.
you wont gain back that weight.
<3<3<3 great support and advice my greek godesss
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Old 04.21.2011, 03:28 PM   #18
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life's too short to waste your time obsessing with calories. don't do it.
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Old 04.21.2011, 03:32 PM   #19
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yr right. part of my OCD i suppose. in other areas of my life i have become lee obsesive. i just worked so hard to get where i am now i am scared of it going away.<3
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Old 04.21.2011, 03:46 PM   #20
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dang... i hope you're seeing a good shrink on a regular basis.
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