does anyone here like to be abused?

atsonicpark · 06.29.2009, 08:50 AM

This isn't the same as the "I wanna be beaten" thread.

Also, I can see this thread getting disturbing real quick.

...

I have noticed, in my life, that I generally get in abusive relationships (yes, I'm a guy) (yes, the abuse is mental, not physical) and for some reason I cling to them. And it's hard for me to have relationships where I'm not being abused in some way. I'm sure this has to do with being beaten/molested as a young child (notice how casually I throw these facts out whereas most others would keep them hidden -- I don't think it's an awful thing or anything to be ashamed of or whatever.. it's just facts) but I still find it interesting.

I should tell people who walk on me to fuck off. But honestly, I think it kinda... turns me on. Is there something wrong with me?

Satan · 06.29.2009, 08:54 AM

do you mean physical abuse or verbal/mental abuse?

i love to be slapped, whipped, shoved around, bitten, tied up, you name it. call me a bitch/whore/whatever, i'll eat it up. but all in fun.

atsonicpark · 06.29.2009, 08:54 AM

Heh. No, I don't mean in the bedroom. Of course that abuse is fine, healthy, fun, and great.

...

I am saying.. well.. I am asking why I am attracted to people (in the real world) who put me down, use me, and walk on me?

Satan · 06.29.2009, 08:57 AM

ahhh ok
of course i had my mind in the gutter as usual.

i have a limited knowledge of psychology but i do know that people who were abused in any way (mentally, physically, sexually) as a child have a strong tendency to get into abusive relationships as adults and typically have a very hard time leaving their abuser.

Shifty Prophet · 06.29.2009, 09:40 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atsonicpark

Heh. No, I don't mean in the bedroom. Of course that abuse is fine, healthy, fun, and great.

...

I am saying.. well.. I am asking why I am attracted to people (in the real world) who put me down, use me, and walk on me?

Low testasorone count?

Glice · 06.29.2009, 12:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Satan

i have a limited knowledge of psychology but i do know that people who were abused in any way (mentally, physically, sexually) as a child have a strong tendency to get into abusive relationships as adults and typically have a very hard time leaving their abuser.

That's true sometimes, but there's also the self-hatred of being too middle class, abusive-voyeur posh sorts, heavily patriarchal/ matriarchal families, other things. What I'm saying is that there's a spectrum of influences and playing the 'I was abused as a child' card is too simplistic and doesn't explain the complexity of adult sexual/ emotional personalities.

[Sandbag] · 06.29.2009, 01:09 PM

im sure it has to do with these past life experiences you talked about. these experiences are always traumatic..even if you right here and now don't feel so.

.. but there's nothing wrong feeling the way you feel. or liking whatever you like.. if you dont like the way you are because it brings a shitload of problems into your relationships, you should try to see someone to talk about this with (psychologist, friends, girlfriend)

pbradley · 06.29.2009, 03:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atsonicpark

Is there something wrong with me?

What would you get out of an answer to this? It doesn't fit my mental image of you to ask, though of course I am by no means an expert on atsonicpark.

HECKLER SPRAY · 06.29.2009, 07:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atsonicpark

I should tell people who walk on me to fuck off. But honestly, I think it kinda... turns me on. Is there something wrong with me?

Yes :

http://www.sonicyouth.com/gossip/sho...=shoved+finger

davenotdead · 06.29.2009, 07:23 PM

don't think i do

!@#$%! · 06.29.2009, 07:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atsonicpark

T
I have noticed, in my life, that I generally get in abusive relationships (yes, I'm a guy) (yes, the abuse is mental, not physical) and for some reason I cling to them. And it's hard for me to have relationships where I'm not being abused in some way. I'm sure this has to do with being beaten/molested as a young child (notice how casually I throw these facts out whereas most others would keep them hidden -- I don't think it's an awful thing or anything to be ashamed of or whatever.. it's just facts) but I still find it interesting.

I should tell people who walk on me to fuck off. But honestly, I think it kinda... turns me on. Is there something wrong with me?

that's an interesting adaptation to childhood traumas, and a good show of balls, but about the present tense-- what happened? did your GF fuck a big hole in your bank account an you enjoyed the friction? the way i see it, if you get to smear her cosplay outfits with fresh spunk it's alright if you foot the bill.

atsonicpark · 06.29.2009, 08:12 PM

She reads this board so I'm not going to go into it right now but maybe one day, if things don't improve.

jon boy · 06.29.2009, 08:15 PM

in the bedroom i dont mind a bit of abuse 'do it harder you fucker' that kind of thing but not really physical stuff. i give out the odd spank and that kinda thing but i am far from buying the nipple clamps.

!@#$%! · 06.29.2009, 09:11 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atsonicpark

She reads this board so I'm not going to go into it right now but maybe one day, if things don't improve.

whoa! are you trying to send her a message?

triangulating with the internet is a relationship move alien to me, but best wishes.

ps- you could post under an alias. eg: animesugardaddy

EVOLghost · 06.29.2009, 11:42 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atsonicpark

This isn't the same as the "I wanna be beaten" thread.

Also, I can see this thread getting disturbing real quick.

...

I have noticed, in my life, that I generally get in abusive relationships (yes, I'm a guy) (yes, the abuse is mental, not physical) and for some reason I cling to them. And it's hard for me to have relationships where I'm not being abused in some way. I'm sure this has to do with being beaten/molested as a young child (notice how casually I throw these facts out whereas most others would keep them hidden -- I don't think it's an awful thing or anything to be ashamed of or whatever.. it's just facts) but I still find it interesting.

I should tell people who walk on me to fuck off. But honestly, I think it kinda... turns me on. Is there something wrong with me?

so if one day I beat you up n stuff....will you accept an invitation for some coffee later?

pbradley · 06.29.2009, 11:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by atsonicpark

She reads this board so I'm not going to go into it right now but maybe one day, if things don't improve.

Just don't go applying any permanent solutions to any temporary problems.

pbradley · 06.29.2009, 11:59 PM

Your first girlfriend would cut you with a razor?

pbradley · 06.30.2009, 12:09 AM

brootal

alteredcourse · 06.30.2009, 12:39 AM

I see what youre saying ASP...Sorry, I do not have the same experience as you.

Do you think there is any way that your girlfriend, and past girlfriends, have gotten as much out of the relationship? I mean, even if what you're getting out of it is fucked and doesnt seem right to you (if thats what it is?), are there things that your partners stay for? I seriously doubt that they stay just so that they can be the upper hand, simply as that.

phoenix · 06.30.2009, 02:43 AM

hmmm. I've always held on to emotionally detrimental relationships for much longer than I should have. If you want to give a reason for it, it could fall under daddy/parental issues or it could just be that I'm far too sympathetic and want to keep giving people 'chances'. Emotional abuse doesn't really turn me on at all.. just turns me into a wreck.. and to be honest I'm more than capable of doing that all on my own, so I don't need anyone else to help me out in that way. I've always tended to go after things I can't have(or can't have at first), because that is fun and a turn on. It's a never ending challenge, and if I end up getting them, I often didn't want them anymore. It's like a game. So I suppose you could combine that with the emotionally harmful relationship issues.. and that might be why I've stuck around longer than I should've.. Because I've always thought it was something I could eventually win.. without thinking if I wanted it in the end?
It might be very different for a guy, though. My current boyshape has major mommy issues and digs a bit of abuse, but I'm not sure about whether it's an ongoing issue in his relationships. Maybe? His mom used to throw stuff at him, and he was the eldest a somewhat hectic family so really likes to create drama at times. I've always thought it due to feeling like he didn't get the attention he wanted as a kid, you know?

06.29.2009, 08:50 AM	#1
atsonicpark invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 28,843	This isn't the same as the "I wanna be beaten" thread. Also, I can see this thread getting disturbing real quick. ... I have noticed, in my life, that I generally get in abusive relationships (yes, I'm a guy) (yes, the abuse is mental, not physical) and for some reason I cling to them. And it's hard for me to have relationships where I'm not being abused in some way. I'm sure this has to do with being beaten/molested as a young child (notice how casually I throw these facts out whereas most others would keep them hidden -- I don't think it's an awful thing or anything to be ashamed of or whatever.. it's just facts) but I still find it interesting. I should tell people who walk on me to fuck off. But honestly, I think it kinda... turns me on. Is there something wrong with me? __________________
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

06.29.2009, 08:54 AM	#2
Satan invito al cielo Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: noo yawk Posts: 6,331	do you mean physical abuse or verbal/mental abuse? i love to be slapped, whipped, shoved around, bitten, tied up, you name it. call me a bitch/whore/whatever, i'll eat it up. but all in fun. __________________ "I love meth." - batreleaser
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

06.29.2009, 08:54 AM	#3
atsonicpark invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 28,843	Heh. No, I don't mean in the bedroom. Of course that abuse is fine, healthy, fun, and great. ... I am saying.. well.. I am asking why I am attracted to people (in the real world) who put me down, use me, and walk on me? __________________
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

06.29.2009, 08:57 AM	#4
Satan invito al cielo Join Date: Jul 2006 Location: noo yawk Posts: 6,331	ahhh ok of course i had my mind in the gutter as usual. i have a limited knowledge of psychology but i do know that people who were abused in any way (mentally, physically, sexually) as a child have a strong tendency to get into abusive relationships as adults and typically have a very hard time leaving their abuser. __________________ "I love meth." - batreleaser
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

06.29.2009, 01:09 PM	#7
[Sandbag] 100% Join Date: Jun 2008 Posts: 820	im sure it has to do with these past life experiences you talked about. these experiences are always traumatic..even if you right here and now don't feel so. .. but there's nothing wrong feeling the way you feel. or liking whatever you like.. if you dont like the way you are because it brings a shitload of problems into your relationships, you should try to see someone to talk about this with (psychologist, friends, girlfriend) __________________ My new facebook page for my new mainstream noise band
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

06.29.2009, 07:23 PM	#10
davenotdead invito al cielo Join Date: Nov 2006 Posts: 7,784	don't think i do __________________
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

06.29.2009, 08:12 PM	#12
atsonicpark invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 28,843	She reads this board so I'm not going to go into it right now but maybe one day, if things don't improve. __________________
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

06.29.2009, 08:15 PM	#13
jon boy invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: psycho battery Posts: 12,161	in the bedroom i dont mind a bit of abuse 'do it harder you fucker' that kind of thing but not really physical stuff. i give out the odd spank and that kinda thing but i am far from buying the nipple clamps. __________________ Sarcasm[A] is stating the opposite of an intended meaning especially in order to sneeringly, slyly, jest or mock a person, situation or thing \|@ <------- Euphoric brain cell just moments before expiration V _ \ / _ PING <-------- moments later / \ http://media.tumblr.com/tumblr_ljhxq...isruo1_500.gif
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

06.29.2009, 11:59 PM	#17
pbradley invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: SoKo Posts: 10,621	Your first girlfriend would cut you with a razor?
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

06.30.2009, 12:09 AM	#18
pbradley invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: SoKo Posts: 10,621	brootal
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

06.30.2009, 12:39 AM	#19
alteredcourse expwy. to yr skull Join Date: Jun 2006 Posts: 1,503	I see what youre saying ASP...Sorry, I do not have the same experience as you. Do you think there is any way that your girlfriend, and past girlfriends, have gotten as much out of the relationship? I mean, even if what you're getting out of it is fucked and doesnt seem right to you (if thats what it is?), are there things that your partners stay for? I seriously doubt that they stay just so that they can be the upper hand, simply as that.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|

06.30.2009, 02:43 AM	#20
phoenix invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: the future where it's hot and dark Posts: 5,926	hmmm. I've always held on to emotionally detrimental relationships for much longer than I should have. If you want to give a reason for it, it could fall under daddy/parental issues or it could just be that I'm far too sympathetic and want to keep giving people 'chances'. Emotional abuse doesn't really turn me on at all.. just turns me into a wreck.. and to be honest I'm more than capable of doing that all on my own, so I don't need anyone else to help me out in that way. I've always tended to go after things I can't have(or can't have at first), because that is fun and a turn on. It's a never ending challenge, and if I end up getting them, I often didn't want them anymore. It's like a game. So I suppose you could combine that with the emotionally harmful relationship issues.. and that might be why I've stuck around longer than I should've.. Because I've always thought it was something I could eventually win.. without thinking if I wanted it in the end? It might be very different for a guy, though. My current boyshape has major mommy issues and digs a bit of abuse, but I'm not sure about whether it's an ongoing issue in his relationships. Maybe? His mom used to throw stuff at him, and he was the eldest a somewhat hectic family so really likes to create drama at times. I've always thought it due to feeling like he didn't get the attention he wanted as a kid, you know? __________________ tiny and lost.
	\|QUOTE AND REPLY\|