[dead_battery]

Originally Posted by SuchFriendsAreDangerous

Had these a few months ago, started up again last night. They were nightmarish in the sense that it was a reliving scenarios of my worst moments in real life only revisited in a different, mundane but newly painful way. I woke up so damned pissed and depressed I didn't know what was affecting me worse, the anger or the sorrow. Its still fucking with me a paper-cut on your right hand that grazes everything you touch and stings, not bad enough to stop you, but strong enough to burn all the way to the depth and core your being. Sighs. Fuck, Shit. and my dreams are usually so pleasant and enjoyable..

what ARE the worst experiences of your life? what brought you into the arms of jah and the placid embrace of ganja?

[SuchFriendsAreDangerous]

Originally Posted by dead_battery

what ARE the worst experiences of your life? what brought you into the arms of jah and the placid embrace of ganja?

This isn't the place, neither are you an appropriate Confessor, but the gist? I've made several horribly bad decisions (many of which I am still paying to consequences of) and have had some people, men and women, do me real dirty. Even on the streetz, I always had too much heart yo. Why am I a man of deep Faith? Simply put, without the Almighty-I, my life would have been lost years ago.

I know my life is not promised that's why the wise walk in silence

Young Noble the Outlawz

[dead_battery]

one love me breddren.

[Rob Instigator]

a crusty gutter-punk in Austin (asstown) TX once asked me for change back in 1999. I was with a friend of mine and reached into my pocket for the fresh amount. I handed him a dollar bill (at the time I was earning about $7.25/hr as a file clerk and money was TIGHT) and the fucker proceeded to grab it, look at it, and them look at me and asks, "Come on man, can you give me $5?"
I grabbed the fucking dollar back while telling him to go fuck himself, and he got very agitated (like a lot of entitled trust fund runaways in Asstown) and started ranting about something.
My friend pulled me away as the guy pulled out a knife. I kept saying "I'll kick your stank gutter ass, motherfucker!" because I had not seen the knife, but luckily he had his gutter woman and their gutter baby with them so he didn't chase us.

True story.

[dead_battery]

got dang.

gutter baby? aint no such thing in europe. you couldnt be on the street like that with a child, it wouldnt be allowed. thank you socialism.

[dead_battery]

Originally Posted by SuchFriendsAreDangerous

This isn't the place, neither are you an appropriate Confessor, but the gist? I've made several horribly bad decisions (many of which I am still paying to consequences of) and have had some people, men and women, do me real dirty. Even on the streetz, I always had too much heart yo. Why am I a man of deep Faith? Simply put, without the Almighty-I, my life would have been lost years ago.

Young Noble the Outlawz

Also I have been perpetually screwed over by reels and reels of human beings in fucking succession over and over again without respite for years so yeah I get what you're saying.

[SuchFriendsAreDangerous]

Originally Posted by dead_battery

Also I have been perpetually screwed over by reels and reels of human beings in fucking succession over and over again without respite for years so yeah I get what you're saying.

I've come to learn, its not them, its me. Life is how you react and how you revolve to the externalities presented each and every moment. People are people, I love them even MORE when they express their natural flaws. Its up to myself to do better internally and readjust to certain ontological realities outside of one's individual control. "It is what it is," as is said in the Hood or as they say in Arabic, "God is good, what else can be done?"

Originally Posted by MC TREE

I know me I ain't trying to find me

[truncated]

I miss Nefeli. I want to eat her up.

[h8kurdt]

Originally Posted by truncated

I miss Nefeli. I want to eat her up.

 

They all come crawling back.

[truncated]

 

[EVOLghost]

Originally Posted by h8kurdt

 

They all come crawling back.

forrrealz. When someone comes back, even for a short while, other people return too.....

[pony]

Hi mum!

[truncated]

My baby <3

[dead_battery]

uh

[pony]

I just learned a poem by heart. And no one made me do it. I am so proud now. I will recite it to one person every day to make sure it'll be in my head for a loooong time. oh, maybe I should learn more!! SO MUCH FUN

[Nefeli]

Originally Posted by truncated

I miss Nefeli. I want to eat her up.

yo babe, i m right here.


i have to admit that another cold is lurking and this time i cant handle another one so soon. been having nervous cig(?) coughing especially when i m at drawing. and i cant enjoy smoking. fuck this shit. i 'd stuff myself with vitamin C, but i cant spend any more money on pills. fruits it will be.

[Nefeli]

Originally Posted by SuchFriendsAreDangerous

Had these a few months ago, started up again last night. They were nightmarish in the sense that it was a reliving scenarios of my worst moments in real life only revisited in a different, mundane but newly painful way. I woke up so damned pissed and depressed I didn't know what was affecting me worse, the anger or the sorrow. Its still fucking with me a paper-cut on your right hand that grazes everything you touch and stings, not bad enough to stop you, but strong enough to burn all the way to the depth and core your being. Sighs. Fuck, Shit. and my dreams are usually so pleasant and enjoyable..

im sorry. apart from the awful feeling while waking up, which we cant fight, i say try to ignore them during the rest of the day.
i really dont have anything to suggest.

i was cleansed from all bad feelings for almost 6 weeks and it has been amazing. no parameter of my life had changed, but i was feeling great. i tried to make it last more and i dont want to admit that it has ended.

[Nefeli]

sorry. i ll rant about smth else.

i made a new friend this summer.
he is very smart, young at 22 and hilarious.
he has some defect in his leg, but honestly i hadnt noticed it or paid attention to it. i mean i saw it but it was my friend who pointed it out to me and made me feel that we should ask.

yesterday we went for coffee, as he is leaving for London tomorrow.
and i asked him about his leg.
i kind of regret it now, but of course i did it out of interest.
if we are going to be friends, wouldnt it be showing indifference if i didnt ask. i dont know.
he was very ok with it and told me his story -also this makes you come closer to a person- but he said that half a year ago, he would erase anyone who asked. he had a surgery last april and somewhat improved the situation. he is now very cool about it and revealed things that made me respect him more. not that i didnt already or wouldnt without those info.
i regret asking. maybe it was too soon and i should had let him do it. and i cant do anything now.

[EVOLghost]

 

[EVOLghost]

RIP Hiroshi Yamauchi(president of Nintendo before the current one).