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#381 |
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K-krack, now inspired, puts a patent on a toilet that embraces you warmly as you defecate into it's porcelain pot.
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#382 |
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Unfortunately, k-krack was mutilated by his own invention months later.
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#383 |
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Luckily the mutilation was only a cut/scar, and was just another story fo' da' ladiez.
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#384 |
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"k-krack is a fucking liar!" shouted the narrator, "i saw it happen! they had to reattatch his entire arm!"
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#385 |
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"That's fucking bullshit! They took that out of context!!! M arm was off before i got on the fucking toilet!!!" shouted a pissed of k-krack.
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#386 |
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"narrators aren't allowed to do things like that, or we might end up in your situation, mr. krack," firmly stated the narrator, "i speak nothing but the truth"
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#387 |
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"What a fucking load... Lemme talk to yr fucking manager. i want this bullshit cleaned up, this is fucking garbage. reporting false.. fucking..information... it's bullshit... fucking straight-up, grade-a BULLSHIT!!!!" replied the now infuriated k-krack.
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#388 |
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"i am the manager. you're wrong." the manager (oops i mean narrator) continued.
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#389 |
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BANG
"This just in, narrator has been motha'fuckin' MURDAH'D by k-krack! YES! MURDAH'D by k-krack! That motherfucker's days of spreading bullshit and false info iz OVER!!!" stated the excited and clearly giddy anchorman on the universal news channel. He also hated that dumbass narrator.
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#390 |
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meanwhile, toilette was busy putting up signs that read "lost kitten" with pictures of cantankerous on them.
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#391 |
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"where oh where could she be?" he wondered, as the furrow in his brow continued to grow deeper.
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#392 |
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She was parading around nude as the day she was born and putting her tits in nature magazines, that ho.
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#393 |
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little did k-krack realize that cantankerous was born fully clothed.
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Woops, did i say "as the day she was born?" i meant to say "naked as somebody having sex," sorry about the confusion.
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#395 |
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KhChris (original) showed up and typed about Saturnine's boobs in
ALL CAPS BOLD LARGE FONT. (giggles)
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#396 |
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Now that that is out of the way, it's over to Jenny, with tonights weather forecast! What news, Jenny?
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#397 |
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Well, thanks Jim, it seems that rain is due, and everybody wants to be gay!
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Sab Kuch Tick Tock Hai |
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#398 |
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Thanks Jenny, and on that note, it's been a wonderful day, and we here at Totally Shitty News swish you a good september 3 evening. thanks for watching and goodniiiiiiggght everyone.
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#399 |
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Suddenly the news flickered back on, reading "special report"
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"This just in! cantankerous has finally put some goddamn clothes on and she and coco will be putting on a free concert at altamont speedway!" announced the news anchorman.
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