[_slavo_]

Originally Posted by FreshChops

 

Hi, I'm a 2880! I replace friends and don't hog the weed.

Oh, I now really want this one !

[ploesj]

Originally Posted by hevusa

Because my friend pre girlfriend is much different from now. It just sucks how relationships do that to people. And get this... he is 35 and the girl is 23. It is only a matter of time before it busts. Hopefully I will have something going before that so he can't try to come back.

Who at 35 keeps texting their girlfriend at every little break during practice? FUCK!

i know a couple with a 25 year old girl and a 40 year old guy... they have been together for five years and are planning to get married.

sometimes age really is just a number.

[ploesj]

and speaking about disappointing friends, try being around someone when you just found out her whole life is a lie (really)

i'm still thinking about a way how to confront her.

she basically told tons of stories about her life, including being in a mental institution, and dating a few rather famous belgian musicians (not just a one night stand but an actual relationship, and living together)
since she told those stories to anyone she met, and almost everyone knows these guys or friends of these guys, and some of them are married or in a relationship, and she says she wasn't even legal at the time they were dating... i started to think it might do some damage to them when she spread such stories. i also found them much harder to believe every day.

then i started doing some concert photography jobs and got in touch with some of them. they had never heard of her. somehow it felt great to see my suspicions being true, but at the same time i was pretty shocked to find out that someone had been lying to me about basically everything.

i do feel like i have some power though. what would happen if the rest of her friends hear this?

[ploesj]

Originally Posted by Nefeli

how long do you know her? (she obviously needs professional help).

yeah, i know. she has all characteristics of borderline and mythomania. i kind of stopped meeting up with her because she annoyed me so much (always talking about the guys she slept with and how much she drank last night and never even showing a snippet of intrest in anyone else... i remember her talking about her boyfriend while he was sitting right next to her and saying "well, he's everything i need: rich, hot and under 30")

she would text me on school days at 3 in the morning, asking me to go out and drink. when i replied i was in bed already and had to get up early, she would get mad and not speak to me for days.

when i met th boy who is now py partner, she was going all "oh he's so nice let's invite him to this and this and this" but as soon as she noticed he was interested in me she got pissed, and after we became a couple she didn't want him to be anywhere near her anymore and kept making snide remarks about him...

that sort of stuff happened before, when she'd meet some asshole in a bar and ask him to her party the next day, then threw herself at his feet. when the guy tried to hit on me instead (i rejected him) she suddenly hated him.

me, my boyfriend and another illustrator were celebrating the other illustrator's birthday at a bar, drawing comics together. she texts me to ask if i want to go out with her. i say i'm at this place already, drawing. she shows up and bores the crap out of everyone with drunk stories, then gets mad because we are still drawing and not listening to her in awe.

that and all the lying... saying she had relationships with guys she doesn't even know, saying that she has been asked to sing at the opera and then never mention it again, saying how she can play soooo many instruments but never actually hear her play.. cancelling going to a concert i ordered tickets for because she is sick, making me having to sell the tickets last-minute, and then posting 'last night as the bar was great' on facebook the next day.

i've known her for a year and her behaviour got so bad even her oldest friends are avoiding her now. she really needs help, and she constantly says that she has issues and is crazy, but she says it like she's proud of it. it makes her different and more special than anyone else.

as long as i keep getting texts like 'hey i want to meet up with you but please make sure that boyfriend of yours is not around' i won't actively get in touch with her anymore.

[Keeping It Simple]

Originally Posted by hevusa

My good friend says he is too old to be in a band at 35 and is quitting on me. What a fucking pussy! I think it is because he has a new girlfriend and doesn't want to be away from her even one night of the week. He probably has such low self-esteem that he thinks she will cheat on him that night. Fucking pussy. Go waste your life, at least you aren't wasting mine anymore.

But you're wasting ours with this shit.

[ploesj]

Originally Posted by Keeping It Simple

But you're wasting ours with this shit.

don't read it then.

[ploesj]

Originally Posted by Nefeli

oh dear, ploesj...what you describe is a nightmare! and things that i thought would take place within years..not in one! that was suprising.

its bad to say it..but no wonder everyone is avoiding her.
one thing is, to do that too..other, to maintain minimun communication so she go completely mad at you (do you wonder she might start saying bad things about you, or try to harm you in any way?)..other is to confront her and tell her she needs help and until then that you cant hang around- use as an excuse that she doesnt like your bf. im afraid that its certain she will deny everything and your conversation wont have any result..

yeah... i've hinted at those things and it caused her to go completely mad. her reaction to me getting together with my bf was being mad because she felt left out. i haven't spoken to her in a few months and i'm quite happy about that! she sometimes starts talkng to me on facebook about going to a festival with a band she 'knows' but forgets that i know these guys too... and when i remind her of that 'oh that's nice, say hi to ***** from me, he bought one of my books last week!' she quickly changes subject. anyway, i kind of stopped caring by now.

oh and an update: i just talked to a mutual friend who called me to say that she has been telling everyone who knows me that i became an arrogant and stuck-up bitch... he didn't believe a word of it and called me to let me know. ugh.

[knox]

people with mythomania are fun to hang out with, not so much as friends I guess.

[hevusa]

Originally Posted by Nefeli

thought so. thats why wanted to ask you how would you feel if he told her to be around while you practicing.

He already wanted her sitting outside the door during practice. I thought that was way too Yoko creepy.

[knox]

why couldn't she come inside?

do you realise yoko ono is possibly the best human being ever?

[hevusa]

Originally Posted by knox

why couldn't she come inside?

That is where he wanted her. I thought the idea was totally inappropriate because we had only practiced with the bassist once or twice and didn't really have anything going yet.

Fucking stupid Yoko moves. Lennon was such a little prick for letting Yoko in on sessions.

[hevusa]

Originally Posted by ann ashtray

starting a band with any of them, and taking it seriously, is almost pointless.

That is sad, because it wasn't like that pre aughts.

[knox]

Originally Posted by hevusa

That is where he wanted her. I thought the idea was totally inappropriate because we had only practiced with the bassist once or twice and didn't really have anything going yet.

Fucking stupid Yoko moves. Lennon was such a little prick for letting Yoko in on sessions.

that's kind of sad. if you wanna respect your friends, you gotta respect their choices too. she's your friend's girlfriend, you gotta treat her with courtesy and respect.

if this is your general attitude then perhaps it's not surprising he chose to leave? just wondering.

i always took my current boyfriends to rehearsals and nobody ever had that kind of reaction.

[space]

I'd rather spend time with my girl over any silly band.

unless, of course, that band is Thunderbolt Pagoda, and then, she's welcome to sit outside the door.

you people don't know disappointing friends.

[PAULYBEE2656]

to the origional poster!

try being a friend, if you say you are, and then respect his wishes and feelings. im sure if his self esteem is low, he doesnt need a so called friend fucking about like he is! but to be honest, you dont seem to be acting like a friend to him! sort it out its only a fucking band!!!!!

[chicka]

I think he's just head over heels in love with her and wants to be with her as much as possible. Love is funny like that. Especially the age difference leads me to believe he probably feels blessed to have a young hard body.

[hevusa]

Originally Posted by knox

that's kind of sad. if you wanna respect your friends, you gotta respect their choices too. she's your friend's girlfriend, you gotta treat her with courtesy and respect.

if this is your general attitude then perhaps it's not surprising he chose to leave? just wondering.

i always took my current boyfriends to rehearsals and nobody ever had that kind of reaction.

If he was into the band idea as much as he was before this chick entered his life there would be no problems.
I wouldn't mind if she was around for practices later... but not for the first few times of playing together as a group. That is some creepy shit.

[ann ashtray]

Most people of his age will take a relationship more seriously than a band. It's how we're hardwired.

[hevusa]

Originally Posted by PAULYBEE2656

to the origional poster!

try being a friend, if you say you are, and then respect his wishes and feelings. im sure if his self esteem is low, he doesnt need a so called friend fucking about like he is! but to be honest, you dont seem to be acting like a friend to him! sort it out its only a fucking band!!!!!

I'm helping him move in 2 weeks. Shut the fuck up. What makes you think I wouldn't continue to be his friend?

[hevusa]

Originally Posted by ann ashtray

Most people of his age will take a relationship more seriously than a band. It's how we're hardwired.

That is the yuppie bullshit I am dealing with right now. It is disappointing to witness as a friend.