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Old 02.27.2007, 06:05 PM   #81
tesla69
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Washing Machine
How did such a wholesome topic as anal sex get on to this?...

yeah we went from anal pleasure to urethral agony...I did read some alleged true sex thing about some perv guy who liked to have his urethra penetrated - he used it like a tiny vagina.

Keep hoping, pal! HA!
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Old 02.27.2007, 06:33 PM   #82
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how did i miss this thread?!!!!

1) i'm happy that adam applies experimentation as his lifestyle

2) kegma is the sesame street of the perv sex threads, you can always count on her giving a lesson in an entertaining way at the end of the day.

3) a good prog song good? listen to 21th century schizoid man or roundabout and you be the judge.
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Old 02.27.2007, 06:58 PM   #83
Inhuman
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rob Instigator
have you ever gone to pee after urethra surgery and had what felt like the world's thickest biggest coagulated blood phlegm loogie get pushed out of your penis by the wall of urine waiting to be released? HOLY FUCK that is the single weirdest horrible feeling I have ever had. it looked worse than it felt tooo, sinking hard to the bottom of the toilet.


THIS IS THE REAL WORLD PEOPLE
NOTHING'S EASY
NOTHING'S FREE

Awww I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN. For me it just BURNED. And I had to go so bad for 3 hours straight, and every time I tried, pure burning. I couldn't walk straight either. There were these older men (which I assume were the 'regulars') by me at the hospital watching me when I was teary eyed and crouched over and they were laughing.
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Old 02.27.2007, 07:00 PM   #84
Washing Machine
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tesla69
I did read some alleged true sex thing about some perv guy who liked to have his urethra penetrated - he used it like a tiny vagina.

Keep hoping, pal! HA!

He would be very well matched to have sex with a man with a very small penis then...
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Old 02.27.2007, 07:00 PM   #85
Danny Himself
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It wouldn't have to be small. Just thin.
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Old 02.27.2007, 07:03 PM   #86
Inhuman
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Danny Himself
It wouldn't have to be small. Just thin.

and if it was long enough, it might even tickle his bladder...like shoving a raw spaghetti noodle up.
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Old 02.27.2007, 07:03 PM   #87
Washing Machine
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Washing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's asses
A dick so small you need a straw just to give him a blowjob......
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Old 02.27.2007, 07:06 PM   #88
Inhuman
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Washing Machine
A dick so small you need a straw just to give him a blowjob......

hahaha. I once had a girlfriend who too "Blowjob" for real. I'm talking "BLOW JOB". She just...tried to... blow. No moving or anything. It was unpleasant indeed.
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Old 02.27.2007, 07:06 PM   #89
Danny Himself
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Haha. He could fuck wrinkles.
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Old 02.27.2007, 07:11 PM   #90
Washing Machine
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Washing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's assesWashing Machine kicks all y'all's asses
Quote:
Originally Posted by Inhuman
hahaha. I once had a girlfriend who too "Blowjob" for real. I'm talking "BLOW JOB". She just...tried to... blow. No moving or anything. It was unpleasant indeed.

Hahaha
Thats what happens when you get Sex Education from a clown
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Old 02.27.2007, 07:14 PM   #91
Washing Machine
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Danny Himself
Haha. He could fuck wrinkles.

Yeah I forgot to add, his penis is more of nipple really....hes needs twezzers to masturbate....although he would be so lucky, He also has the longest pubes in the world.....poor bastard trips over them everywhere he goes
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Old 02.28.2007, 08:05 AM   #92
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why am i reading this whilst eating my lunch?
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Old 02.28.2007, 10:06 AM   #93
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kegmama
^ Damn, that is one of the most sad, funny and pathetic things I have read on this board in a long time... And on THIS board I have read A LOT of sad, funny and pathetic things.

You sat through it though? Didn't say anything?

hahaha, I didn't say anything because I didn't want to be rude, so I just stopped her
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Old 02.28.2007, 11:09 AM   #94
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Inhuman
Awww I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN. For me it just BURNED. And I had to go so bad for 3 hours straight, and every time I tried, pure burning. I couldn't walk straight either. There were these older men (which I assume were the 'regulars') by me at the hospital watching me when I was teary eyed and crouched over and they were laughing.

fuckheads.
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Old 02.28.2007, 11:21 AM   #95
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Quote:
Originally Posted by swa(y)
butt sex is pretty damned nice. esp. for dudes...

i try and pretned i dont like it near the ammount i actually do.

some girls say they love it...80 percent of them are lying...simply cause they know lotsa dudes wanna here it.

ive only dated one girl that actually could get off from it...

and the most logical thing reason ive actually heard as to why some girls like it is because they can feel the actual length of the dude better.

and as far as being fingered....well...it certainly makes everthing much more intense. ill cum like wayyyy fcuking harder.

theres my personl info for the day.

Well said.
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Old 02.28.2007, 11:41 AM   #96
Confucious is sex
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Girls who don't get off on bum sex are merely afraid of cystitis, which hurts like hell. Keep trying, if she loves you, she'll let your aphid into her rosebud.

ps something harmonious about assholes posting on a thread about assholes, and also, a little self involved
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Old 02.28.2007, 12:23 PM   #97
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mine is too thick. noone wants to try
ex-wife said NO!
current g/f says NO!

le da miedo la carne gorda
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Old 03.02.2007, 01:10 AM   #98
no tengo lengusta
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Old 03.02.2007, 01:17 AM   #99
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rob Instigator
have you ever gone to pee after urethra surgery and had what felt like the world's thickest biggest coagulated blood phlegm loogie get pushed out of your penis by the wall of urine waiting to be released? HOLY FUCK that is the single weirdest horrible feeling I have ever had. it looked worse than it felt tooo, sinking hard to the bottom of the toilet.


THIS IS THE REAL WORLD PEOPLE
NOTHING'S EASY
NOTHING'S FREE

that had to be kind of satisfying though, (not sexually of course) like blowing a huge snot rocket out of your nose. i do that in the shower; the steam loosens up all the snot and whatever other unreachable nasty green shit collects in my nasal cavities.
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Old 03.02.2007, 01:21 AM   #100
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Rob Instigator
le da miedo la carne gorda

HA HA HA HA HA HA!!!!

priceless.

============

well it seems i missed the whole thread.

i just want to chime in to say: no need to stick the whole schlong in it-- a little well-lubed finger (drool works) will do wonders for the flower of her secret (just keep those fingernails short & free of sharp edges).
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