Bill's ok.. He's into young girls...

I sit at the bar and think about what kind of drink I want to buy.. After a couple of minutes I pull a blunt out and take it straight to the dome. After a couple hits I pass it to the left

...I have a hit from a blunt too and say thankyou to Joel.

I sit there, thinking about Erik Satie and what he would do in a situation like this...

i walk in cheesed off my ball
sit in a booth and cheese nips
lips lips open slits

I come in disheveled and wearing the same clothes from last night. Bill Murray is finishing his shift and now Henry Winkler is starting.

I ask Henry if they serve lunch. He says yes and sends a waitress my way.

I order some soup and a corned beef sandwich.

I order a bottle of vodka and start pouring myself shots.

I pour a shot out on the floor. "this is for my amp. It died again today"

dreams burn down by ride playing.

i come in and greet spectral with a 'aaaaaa!!!' and a pat on the back like the heathen kings of old.

then we get drunk and dance while bill murray frowns and then finally gives in by singing 'mooore than thiiiissss'

I come in and scream "Oh blody 'ell."

I come in and then turn around and go back out.

I enter, it's my first bar and I'm definitely not of age.
I get a Dr. Pepper and start bitching about how she should dump him.

I begin to feel woozy from the Dr. Pepper, and pass out. I've been rufi'd! Who's taking me home tonight?!

Spectral takes k-krack home and everyone leaves but me an bill who engage in a cool discussion about eggplants.

I sit there drunk on my vodka, looking at King Buzzo, who is obviously tripping, because he is talking to himself about eggplants and yelling at me about date rape. K-krack is passed out at the bar.

"looks like somebody slipped him a mickey" I say to myself.

i walk in, take advantage of passed out k-krack, and leave unoticed

henry winkler asks me why K-krack's pants are down.

I shrug and drink another shot

As a married type person, I naturally steer clear of the place, but encourage others to maybe talk to Julian about his "opening line," which goes something like:

"Hi, I'm Julian. I live with my parents and have been known to post shirtless photos of myself on messageboards which I later regret doing. I have an aversion to performing cunnilingus, but nonetheless I would really like to get to work on losing my virginity. Feel like breaking me in? NOT YOU, HENRY! THE GIRL!"

I really wish I could rep that.

No offense Julian.

Danny, suitably dressed in full pimp regalia, strolls casually into the bar flanked by his entourage of whores and dumb muscles. He puts Bright Eyes on the jukebox and then promptly exits, leaving the singles to sob quietly to themselves over their virgin steamboats.

i parade in with a bottle of vodka and try to seduce danny. it works. boy turns off the bright eyes and i make you all watch.

I awake, and see Danny being fucked by her, and immediately rush to partake in brosex (with Danny).
No homo.

I shoot Savage Clone. He dies.

I walk in with sunglasses on even though it's dark, not to look cool, but just because I've forgotten to take them off from earlier. I sit in a booth by myself. I wouldn't mind if somebody came and sat at my table, but I can tell nobody wants to because I'm not the happiest camper at the moment, and I think it shows. I sip on my weak rum and coke I spent 4 dollars on and I hum a Cocteau Twins song, wishing I knew what Fraser was saying, if she was even saying anything at all.

"Oh no, not the SY board orgy again..." I say to myself quietly...

hmmm.....this bar is full of dudes!!

Yeah, it's more of the SY sausage bar, but that's ok.

Yeah, women generally don't enjoy the online roleplaying too much.
...Losers.

I walk up to Chris Cunningham; taking a drag on my cigarette; exhale in the general direction of the ceiling and smile shyly. Then I notice from out of the corner of my eye, Savage Clone sneaking in through the back door, a bong in his hand...

Sweet edit!

I walk in, I walk out...bars aren't my thing.

At first I read this as
I walk in, I walk out...boys aren't my thing.

I just recently got into bars. There's barely any good ones, and the roudy teenage shit-i'm-drunk ones are abundant. There's a Russian one called the Avante Garde Bar that hosts noise shows in Ottawa though, and it's scattered with art; I really dig the place. Last time I went, I spent 2 hours talking to a guy about sociology.

It's the crowd. I couldn't be dragged into a bar if the crowd didn't fit me. You know, people who don't give a fuck. In a good way.

God comes back and revives him with elctro-shock therapy.

crypto walks back in to grab a drink

I sit next to crypto, to usurp his coll aura. And we talk about chicks.

Ahh I come in the bar for the 2nd night in a row, see crypto and syn talking and just join in.

Bill's a bit happier than yesterday, he got a dog.

Hum's - Little Dipper is on.

i am alone in the bar waiting for bill to come back from the wc and bumping this thread on the bar's computer.

The bar begins to shift in metaphysical space, due to the lack of female presence, and the weight of the testosterone emanating from all the testicles... It begins to turn into... A horror-themed goth bar from the future. Goblin is playing a cover of Nirvana's D7, as I smooth down my leather trenchcoat...

i walk in with season 3 of F.R.I.E.N.D.S
the goblin stops playing his cover and a record scratching noise is played
i then ask if i could have my copy of sex and the city season 1 back

The goblin transforms into the midget from twin peaks, and says in a backwards voice; there's nothing good on tv nowadays...

i look at the midget and say "get..fucked"

he then looks at me and says "you are"