I look at the midget and say, "you taking to me? You talking to me?" Then I say timidly, "Priscilla, Queen of the Desert." Nick Cave then walks in...

Saunters in, checking his shoes. Shoes are shit hot. Loudly complains at the lack of 'a decent fucking ale' at the bar. Unsure if this is an American bar or a British one, scalps bar for jailbait. Ends up talking to weird guy with beard who may or may not be homeless but certainly has one eye higher than the other about the repealing of the corn laws. Fucks off swiftly to a dancehall/ happy hardcore night, gets AIDS off of a 15-year-old. Dies swiftly.

It's an Australian bar...

Walks in with a group of friends from different ethnic backgrounds than Glice's as he is about to catch Aids. Glice walks towards sarramkrop's friends and starts telling them off about their racial status in what he perceives as being his own bar in his own country. Someone shouts racist at Glice but then they realize that he's catching Aids off a racist 15 year old girl. Racist.

Oh, well in that case I'll start a fight about the cricket/ rugby with some lesbian.

Yes dear, yes you do.

Yes. you do. Racist.

Ladiesandgentlemenwearefloatingslowlyinspace.

In fact, contrary to your herewith assertion, it is you that is the racist.

at least this place has good music.

Like, how? Racist.

Oh, always...

Look at you. You're sitting on a chair/ hovering above a desk/ typing on a phone/ interacting with technology in some other manner. It's a proven fact that racists interact with technology in exactly the same way. Which is proof that you are a racist. I couldn't be a racist. I'm not doing anything racist.

Where's all the chocolate's gone? Where's all the chocolate's gone?

So I shall assume that one of your slaves is doing the typing for you? Racist.

"Racism makes me sad. Why don't you come under my non-racist umbrella, y'racist gobshite?"

You've just abducted Keisha in order to make you feel like a non-racist when in fact she looks sad because of the way you are using her to cover your obvious lack non-racism. If you weren't racist you normally wouldn't call for help. Racist.

"No lamby, you're confused - just because he's Italian doesn't mean he's not a prick."