most hopelessly gun-in-your-mouth depressed you've ever been?
 

Reveal the deepest, darkest times in your life.

Probably last year. Couple of deaths, love stuff, school stuff. I was just generally really sick of everything.
Nothing a couple of drinks couldn't fix! hurhur

Yeah man. This past year.. from august 8th, 2008 to now.. has definitely been the worst year of my life.

Just found out I was adopted, broke my foot, relatives died... yeah, it wasn't too fun.

What happened on the 8th august that initiated it? If I may ask so.

When my friend killed himself with me and one or two others present, we were skateboarding, and he threw himself into a car and got his head crushed.
Telling a mom about how her son killed himself is not something I wish on anybody.
Haven't skated since.

My aunt died. I really only had 3 family members left in my life.. grandpa, mom, and aunt. She died (of an accidental prescription overdose) (no, she didn't take anything extra, and she didn't take any more of her medication than she should've) (yes, my mom and grandpa have decided to sue the doctor that prescribed the medication she was on...), and that caused my grandpa and mom to go insane and become suicidal themselves. I inherited a house that my aunt was renting out to some scummy people at the time, and I had to kick these people out, and I've been in and out of court myself a good 20 times at least. A blackness has filled my heart because of all of this.. and there's more... and my friends and, uh, girlfriend I guess, have all said I've become less "enjoyable" to be around. Also, my job too -- they say I have an attitude problem. I'm not directly blaming it on anything in particular, but certainly, all the shit I've dealt with in the past year.. and the fact that no one has been willing to try to understand the difficulties I've been facing.. has contributed to this being the worst year of my life.

i've been diagnosed with depression but i just think that doctors don't know genius when they see it

I don't know what caused it particularly but I had an adjustment disorder my third year of college. Sleeping all day, refusing social interaction, thoughts of suicide daily, etc. I got out of it right before my mother was deciding to put me on anti-depressants. However, I think I heard that remission is high for AD.

When 'N Sync broke up.

I don't like guns, I prefer teh shower floor with some good cutlery myself. But anyway.. not for a while now. A few seperate times definately.

Unfortunately I can relate to the work situation, when I've felt god-awful, my workmates always noticed. It's hard because you're usually doingn your best to hold it together and just get through the day, and when people come out with 'lighten up' and what not.. it doesn't help.

erm, the best advice I can give is to just really work on believing there is light at the end of it all, because there often is. Focusing on really picturing how things WILL be better soon enough, even if it is hard to believe right now, helps.

I tend to really become quite introverted and more spiritual in those times. It helps me to try and remember that I'm just in a transition period, and that life does not ever stop to leave you completely lost and stuck in any one moment. I believe in connecting energies in all things/people, and that every point in life has something to learn from even if it is thoroughly an awful experience. If you take a moment to really examine how your life is, you might find that aside from the things you cannot control, some of the downward spiral might be something you can stop, or give in to (if it is a path that is unavoidable, and fighting against it in the first place is what is causing the slump).

so, yeh.

Gun to the lower back of the head/neck is probably the fastest way. Take out the medulla and you're done. Most everything else endangers only brain damage.

And I disagree with the "light at the end of the tunnel" answer. Come to understand the beautiful things about the tunnel.

exactly pbradley. The thing about depression is it can be really hard to focus on anything but the negatives, but you have to put things in perspective, no matter how hard it is to do.

Would never say I was ever so depressed I was on the verge or seriously contemplated suicide, however there was a time when I went to the emergency room because I was vomiting blood. They had to put a tube down my nose to my stomach, and I had to stay in the hospital for about three days just laying in a bed. That was probobly me at my most helpless and desperate. It fucking sucked and its an experiance I will never forget.

I prefer the slow-motion kind.

Earlier this year. Whenever that last halfassed OD was. Or the start of freshman year. Maybe last year. I have no idea.

I feel like I peaked as an individual in the fucking eighth grade. s'all downhill from here.

2006, January to July

January - got fired from work
February, March - was desperate looking for a job, with money running out
April - mom died suddenly, 2 weeks after that my then-girlfriend dumped me
May, June - I don't really recall this period, I was half-conscious
July - started feeling better, but the previous months were sheer terror.

right before I accepted my life is total shit.

I hear that all the time. It may be true...but I am not thoroughly convinced...heh.

meh.





(that response may in fact be how I react to life.)