What Oprah Had To Say About Men: - Page 2

SpectralJulianIsNotDead · 08.25.2007, 03:04 AM

If you need Oprah to tell you how to have a healthy relationship, you've got some pretty big problems.

Here's Spectraljulian's relationship tips:

You don't have a soulmate. No matter who you date, there is most likely someone better who you could be going out with. Will you necessarily meet a person better than who you are with? Maybe. maybe not. Think of your odds. If he's a slobbering nincompoop then yeah. But maybe you're a horrible bitch and you deserve a slobbering nincompoop.

Don't have low expectations, but don't have high ones either. Have realistic expectations. If you treat your partners well, the higher you can realistically set your expectations. I see hot girls with average looking guys all the time. Because some of those average looking guys are a lot nicer than good looking pricks. It works the other way too.

If you want to get married you're gonna have to settle for less in some area.

Pessimist · 08.25.2007, 01:50 PM

I always get this nagging sensation that Oprah really hates white people....

sellouteater · 08.25.2007, 02:09 PM

sellouteater · 08.25.2007, 02:11 PM

oprahs a bitch see this dude is so pissed hes bout to attack her

atsonicpark · 08.25.2007, 02:36 PM

she's the richest woman alive, giving a few cars as a publicity stunt to some audience members. big fucking whoop. bill gates donates millions of dollars a year to charity, what's the difference? do people really NEED to be billionaires? (I'm not so sure people need to be millionaires even)

SpectralJulianIsNotDead · 08.25.2007, 04:56 PM

Bill Gates should give everyone in the world a dollar.

!@#$%! · 08.26.2007, 09:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SpectralJulianIsNotDead

If you need Oprah to tell you how to have a healthy relationship, you've got some pretty big problems.

Here's Spectraljulian's relationship tips:

You don't have a soulmate. No matter who you date, there is most likely someone better who you could be going out with. Will you necessarily meet a person better than who you are with? Maybe. maybe not. Think of your odds. If he's a slobbering nincompoop then yeah. But maybe you're a horrible bitch and you deserve a slobbering nincompoop.

Don't have low expectations, but don't have high ones either. Have realistic expectations. If you treat your partners well, the higher you can realistically set your expectations. I see hot girls with average looking guys all the time. Because some of those average looking guys are a lot nicer than good looking pricks. It works the other way too.

If you want to get married you're gonna have to settle for less in some area.

somehow i don't foresee you making billions from this sort of foggy advice. a nickel here and there sure. you might even get a free beer.

SynthethicalY · 08.26.2007, 09:49 PM

She should be honored for her celebrity status in honorable charities. But I think Angelina does a better job.

luxinterior · 08.26.2007, 11:47 PM

I like her, she's a winner.

SpectralJulianIsNotDead · 08.27.2007, 06:13 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by !@#$%!

somehow i don't foresee you making billions from this sort of foggy advice. a nickel here and there sure. you might even get a free beer.

My advice is much more specific when people have specific problems, although the best advice to give someone is to "give yourself your own advice, and do what you'd tell someone in your situation to do."

My specific advice usually comes when me and the advice seeker are drinking. I yell "fuck 'em" really loud. Not literally advising the person to fuck said person, but more to let them "fuck off" if said person is causing them grief.

!@#$%! · 08.27.2007, 06:44 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SpectralJulianIsNotDead

My advice is much more specific when people have specific problems, although the best advice to give someone is to "give yourself your own advice, and do what you'd tell someone in your situation to do."

My specific advice usually comes when me and the advice seeker are drinking. I yell "fuck 'em" really loud. Not literally advising the person to fuck said person, but more to let them "fuck off" if said person is causing them grief.

cmon julian, if you applied the same cursory "analysis" to your own advice that you applied to oprah's likely out of context quotations, you would not fare better than she did. you know it... confess...!

SpectralJulianIsNotDead · 08.27.2007, 06:58 AM

I confess, I confess!

Crumb's Crunchy Delights · 08.27.2007, 07:29 AM

I prefer what Mae West had to say:

WARNING! Mae West could be a bit rude. Explicit content coming up.

When I'm good I'm very good, but when I'm bad I'm better.
A hard man... is good to find
It's not the men in my life that counts -- it's the life in my men.
He who hesitates is last.
I go for two kinds of men. The kind with muscles, and the kind without.
So many men... so little time
Too much of a good thing... can be wonderful
Why don't you come on up and see me sometime.. when I've got nothin' on but the radio.
I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it.
A man in love is like a clipped coupon -- it's time to cash in.
A man in the house... is worth two in the street
Marriage is a fine institution, but I'm not ready for an institution.
It's better to be looked over, than overlooked
Give a man a free hand... and he'll run it all over you
Good sex is like good Bridge... If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand
To err is human -- but it feels divine
His mother should have thrown him away...and kept the stork
I don't like myself, I'm crazy about myself.
"Goodness, what beautiful diamonds !" Goodness had nothing to do with it, dearie
I like two kinds of men: domestic and imported
When a girl goes wrong, men go right... after her
I'm the lady who works at Paramount all day... and Fox all night.
Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
I used to be Snow White... but I drifted
Save a boyfriend for a rainy day, and another, in case it doesn't rain
I've been rich and I've been poor... Believe me, rich is better
It's hard to be funny...when you have to be "clean"
I like my clothes to be tight enough to show I'm a woman... but loose enough to show I'm a lady.
She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success... wrong by wrong
You may admire a girl's curves on the first introduction... but the second meeting shows up new angles
You can say what you like about long dresses, but they cover a multitude of shins.
Those who are easily shocked... should be shocked more often
When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before.
You ought to get out of those wet clothes... and into a dry martini

eatmychild · 08.27.2007, 12:02 PM

That's a bit too rude for SY Gossip.

MODS!!!

phoenix · 08.28.2007, 11:13 AM

although they're wonderful quotes Im not sure how much worth they hold since oprah is unhappy and has a lot of intimacy issues.

08.25.2007, 03:04 AM	#21
SpectralJulianIsNotDead invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 7,409	If you need Oprah to tell you how to have a healthy relationship, you've got some pretty big problems. Here's Spectraljulian's relationship tips: You don't have a soulmate. No matter who you date, there is most likely someone better who you could be going out with. Will you necessarily meet a person better than who you are with? Maybe. maybe not. Think of your odds. If he's a slobbering nincompoop then yeah. But maybe you're a horrible bitch and you deserve a slobbering nincompoop. Don't have low expectations, but don't have high ones either. Have realistic expectations. If you treat your partners well, the higher you can realistically set your expectations. I see hot girls with average looking guys all the time. Because some of those average looking guys are a lot nicer than good looking pricks. It works the other way too. If you want to get married you're gonna have to settle for less in some area.
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08.25.2007, 01:50 PM	#22
Pessimist little trouble girl Join Date: Aug 2007 Location: North Carolina Posts: 53	I always get this nagging sensation that Oprah really hates white people.... __________________ D.B. Cooper is alive, and probably planted those fucking bills to throw off the scent.
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08.25.2007, 02:09 PM	#23
sellouteater the end of the ugly Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: i am not going to tell you Posts: 962	__________________ S I T M F T J
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08.25.2007, 02:11 PM	#24
sellouteater the end of the ugly Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: i am not going to tell you Posts: 962	oprahs a bitch see this dude is so pissed hes bout to attack her __________________ S I T M F T J
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08.25.2007, 02:36 PM	#25
atsonicpark invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2006 Posts: 28,843	she's the richest woman alive, giving a few cars as a publicity stunt to some audience members. big fucking whoop. bill gates donates millions of dollars a year to charity, what's the difference? do people really NEED to be billionaires? (I'm not so sure people need to be millionaires even) __________________
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08.25.2007, 04:56 PM	#26
SpectralJulianIsNotDead invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 7,409	Bill Gates should give everyone in the world a dollar.
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08.26.2007, 09:49 PM	#28
SynthethicalY invito al cielo Join Date: Dec 2006 Posts: 7,408	She should be honored for her celebrity status in honorable charities. But I think Angelina does a better job.
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08.26.2007, 11:47 PM	#29
luxinterior invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Location: Missouri, land of the free and home of the brave Posts: 2,351	I like her, she's a winner. __________________ "I sweat like a fucking nun on Sunday...I don't even know what that means." - Sebastian Bach
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08.27.2007, 06:58 AM	#32
SpectralJulianIsNotDead invito al cielo Join Date: Mar 2006 Posts: 7,409	I confess, I confess!
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08.27.2007, 07:29 AM	#33
Crumb's Crunchy Delights expwy. to yr skull Join Date: Jun 2007 Location: okie's in the pokie Posts: 1,352	I prefer what Mae West had to say: WARNING! Mae West could be a bit rude. Explicit content coming up. When I'm good I'm very good, but when I'm bad I'm better. A hard man... is good to find It's not the men in my life that counts -- it's the life in my men. He who hesitates is last. I go for two kinds of men. The kind with muscles, and the kind without. So many men... so little time Too much of a good thing... can be wonderful Why don't you come on up and see me sometime.. when I've got nothin' on but the radio. I generally avoid temptation unless I can't resist it. A man in love is like a clipped coupon -- it's time to cash in. A man in the house... is worth two in the street Marriage is a fine institution, but I'm not ready for an institution. It's better to be looked over, than overlooked Give a man a free hand... and he'll run it all over you Good sex is like good Bridge... If you don't have a good partner, you'd better have a good hand To err is human -- but it feels divine His mother should have thrown him away...and kept the stork I don't like myself, I'm crazy about myself. "Goodness, what beautiful diamonds !" Goodness had nothing to do with it, dearie I like two kinds of men: domestic and imported When a girl goes wrong, men go right... after her I'm the lady who works at Paramount all day... and Fox all night. Is that a gun in your pocket or are you just happy to see me? I used to be Snow White... but I drifted Save a boyfriend for a rainy day, and another, in case it doesn't rain I've been rich and I've been poor... Believe me, rich is better It's hard to be funny...when you have to be "clean" I like my clothes to be tight enough to show I'm a woman... but loose enough to show I'm a lady. She's the kind of girl who climbed the ladder of success... wrong by wrong You may admire a girl's curves on the first introduction... but the second meeting shows up new angles You can say what you like about long dresses, but they cover a multitude of shins. Those who are easily shocked... should be shocked more often When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before. You ought to get out of those wet clothes... and into a dry martini
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08.27.2007, 12:02 PM	#34
eatmychild children of satan Join Date: May 2006 Location: The Shire Posts: 321	That's a bit too rude for SY Gossip. MODS!!! __________________ I survived Encephalitus Lethargica and all I got were these lousy Parkinsonian symptoms.
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08.28.2007, 11:13 AM	#35
phoenix invito al cielo Join Date: Apr 2007 Location: the future where it's hot and dark Posts: 5,926	although they're wonderful quotes Im not sure how much worth they hold since oprah is unhappy and has a lot of intimacy issues. __________________ tiny and lost.
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