[SuchFriendsAreDangerous]

"its different now that I'm poor an aging.. I'll never see this face again...."


you know, as much as everyone else likes it, loves it, ecstatically even, commenting so with a sigh of relief, practically got a standing ovation at the Ethiopian Church this morning... get in where you fit in but who am I?

"tryin recognize the man in the mirror, cuz his reflection makes the pain seem realer.."(makaveli the don)

I am lost. Where to go? I-man 100% Rastafari, but the man in the mirror looks such a contrast to my own internal self-image.. how to readjust.. get in where you fit in but who am I? its funny, I am used to fitting in NO WHERE, but now, I blend in with a crowd full of regular people, but stand out in the places I used to blend... alas alas

time alone oh time will tell..

anyone else have trouble recognizing their own reflection lately?

 

[pokkeherrie]

 

[SuchFriendsAreDangerous]

Originally Posted by pokkeherrie

 

thats about how I feel...

from

 

to

 

it sucks.

[pbradley]

Newsflash.

You were white with your dreads, as well.

[Derek]

Haha burnnnn.

[SuchFriendsAreDangerous]

Originally Posted by pbradley

Newsflash.

You were white with your dreads, as well.

yes, but i was not stuff that white people liked, i was stuff that white people avoided, and in Los Angeles walking around on 46th and Compton Ave where I go to church, or near my brethren's spot on Pacific and Gage or Manchester and Budlong, the difference between being a dreadicated white rasta, and a clean cut white guy is the difference between getting in where you fit in, and tucking yo chain... seen?

I went from looking like white guy who married somebody's sister in to looking like the landlord or the probation officer and that has already put me in several awkward positions just this week, lord have mercy I am still me though i don't look it, and can talk the talk enough to overpower what my city perceives of as a racial handicap. I'm cool with myself, its getting everyone else to be cool as they were last week this week that is the problem..

[Kloriel]

you're going to be fine. don't worry. just don't take backward steps.

[phoenix]

Haven't you had your locks for over 7 years? any big change all of a sudden like that will take time to adjust to.

Your friends wont see you any differently, on the inside. You dont feel any differently on the inside? Shaved head doesnt make you a different person or change your spirituality.

Maybe stay away from the mirror for a while

[Sonic Youth 37]

 

[pbradley]

Originally Posted by SuchFriendsAreDangerous

yes, but i was not stuff that white people liked, i was stuff that white people avoided

Some white people.

From your photos of yourself with the dreads, you actually reminded me of a friend of mine in San Francisco (though he just had long hair, not dreads).

Then again, being rasta in SF must be completely different from being rasta in LA.

Radical ideas are often more profound from non-radical packages.

[pokkeherrie]

Honestly, I can relate a bit... Last year I cut my hair short after 200 years of having it long. The first few days (weeks?) it felt strange every time I looked in the mirror. I also felt as if I looked like everybody else. It'll pass.

[SuchFriendsAreDangerous]

Originally Posted by phoenix

Haven't you had your locks for over 7 years? any big change all of a sudden like that will take time to adjust to.

Your friends wont see you any differently, on the inside. You dont feel any differently on the inside? Shaved head doesnt make you a different person or change your spirituality.

Maybe stay away from the mirror for a while

its not my friends that I am watching out for, its the street in the neighborhood where I chill, where I go to church, where my friends live, where I get dinner etc etc

essentially, with my new look I don't fit in the places I have spent the last several years adjusting too, and that makes it a bit more difficult, I have to approach things with a touch more finesse thats all...

Originally Posted by pbradley

Then again, being rasta in SF must be completely different from being rasta in LA.

Radical ideas are often more profound from non-radical packages.

yes, and being white in SF is fundamentally different than being white in LA, LA is practically a segregated city, and clean cut white folks don't walk (i haven't had a car in five years) the streets in the neighborhoods where I personally feel most at home at.

though I totally agree with you in regards to radical ideas in square packages, in fact, I am relishing in it for the time being

[terriblecanyons]

If fitting in means what your hair looks like... well, that's just stupid.

[SuchFriendsAreDangerous]

Originally Posted by phoenix

Maybe stay away from the mirror for a while

Time takes its crazy toll
and how does your mirror grow
you better watch yourself when you jump into it
'cause the mirror's gonna steal your soul

 

Originally Posted by terriblecanyons

If fitting in means what your hair looks like... well, that's just stupid.

no fitting in means:

1) not getting arrested every time the local pig on the beat sees your new look

2) not getting rolled by every mother fucker who thinks he's hard

3) not getting set tripped on by every mother fucker who is from the literally 1000s of street gangs the criss-cross every possible block and alleyway in this fucking town..

it has taken me years to navigate, on foot, all this drama in all these neighborhoods, and I am just having a weird time readjusting, though I haven't had any real problems I couldn't handle just yet, but its only been a week.. but fuck em, my chucks still folded with the phat blue laces :/

"fuck the world if they can't adjust, its just as well Hail Mary.."

 

[terriblecanyons]

I think you should find a new neighborhood... gang members don't sound like good neighbors

[SuchFriendsAreDangerous]

Originally Posted by terriblecanyons

I think you should find a new neighborhood... gang members don't sound like good neighbors

don't let this internet shit fool you, I'm come from nothin. these folks are my people since I was a little youth, this kind of shit is all I have ever known.

po folks is the shit, they may have drama, but when you can finally get down an relate to them, they have surprisingly a lot to offer. I've sort have been a Rastafari community outreach motherfucker working with these folks for years.. I couldn't relate to any other kinds of people, I mean, I was just out drinking hennesy (its only the third time in 8 years actually and all since sunday, but its like riding a bike) with my brother in a bad ass cadillac 1979 coup de ville on 22" 180 spokes, Devils in the back..Sunroof top.. Diggin the scene .... where else am I gonna go? Starbucks? The Block at Orange? fuck!

[uhler]

i saw my reflection in the mirror today and said to myself, "damn, i'm so good looking." then i gave my bicep a kiss.

[Rob Instigator]

Savor this mindfuck man, for you are not what your hair is and you are not what your skin is (you know this but it is always a shocking refresher when it is suddenly exposed again), and when people clap for you it is not because they think you are now better, but that they think complementary thoughts about your appearance, and that they KNOW it takes some balls to make a radical change, especially when one is as stubbornly self-identified as a rasta man can be. (I've known lots of rasta!)

You ahve experienced a true existential moment, when the tiny smallness of our being crashes with the infinite vastness of our being.

The same experience is felt by those entering monastic lives, when their hair is shorn and they are strpped of all that marks them in their self-created identity. what you are feeling when you look in the mirror is the shock of the rebirth, of the transience of identity. It is a beautiful thing.

You are now Yin to your past Yang. You have crossed the rubicon. you have reached the back of the blue bus.

[Beautiful Plateau]

do a reverse Michael Jackson and you'll be fine

edit: Take a photograph of yourself and post it here please, I want to see the new you

[NWRA]

Apart from when I'm shaving, I only tend to look at my reflection when I'm in the toilets of the Fab cafe, in Leeds, as it has that trippy, blue-lighting which some supermarket toilets have, that makes me look twice-as-handsome as I am. Seriously I look great in that mirror, maybe its that the angle of the lighting somehow emphasises my better qualities and downplays my big nose, but I should just stay in those toilets all evening and try to lure women in from the door. Unfortunately the mirror in our local pub makes me look like a heroin-addict.