[akprodr]

I watched 'Man on Wire' last night. The guy spent a good deal of his life thinking about and then planning and finally executing his stunt to wire-walk between the WTC towers. And then what?

I just realized that is essentially my current problem.

After I graduated college, I decided I wanted to ride my bicycle across the US. After I did that, I kinda got depressed. So I found a tour between MT and AK. Then I decided to move to AK. And things were good.

But I needed a change and decided to move closer to my aging mom in NJ. But now, I'm kind of adrift.

Has this happened to you? And how did you get over it?

[knox]

you don't. you just give yourself another silly goal.

[Lurker]

Don't give yourself goals that can be fulfilled or that can be fulfilled in that definite way. Give yourself something to do that will be a constant life struggle and for which fulfilment is only in the constant working on that purpose.

To use a military metaphor: be a watchman whose goal is unreachable because they always need to be on guard, rather than the bomber pilot whose job is finished after the bombing is done.

[EVOLghost]

Originally Posted by knox

you don't. you just give yourself another silly goal.

yeah just like in that sy song...Quest for the cup...

[artsygrrl]

Originally Posted by knox

you don't. you just give yourself another silly goal.

I disagree to a point. Question is....do you think reaching a goal will make you happy? And then you feel let down until you think of the next goal that you are sure will make you happy this time? And this goes on and on and you've still not reached the happy state you wish stay in?
Then yes, I agree you are spinning your wheels.
I mean, you've done a lot of cool stuff! If you took a break from constant goal-setting, would you be "happy"?
Replace "happy" with "inner peace". Does this help?

[Rob Instigator]

all suffering stems from desire - Buddha

[floatingslowly]

somebody make this man a birthday thread, for fuck's sake.

[!@#$%!]

Originally Posted by akprodr

I watched 'Man on Wire' last night. The guy spent a good deal of his life thinking about and then planning and finally executing his stunt to wire-walk between the WTC towers. And then what?

I just realized that is essentially my current problem.

After I graduated college, I decided I wanted to ride my bicycle across the US. After I did that, I kinda got depressed. So I found a tour between MT and AK. Then I decided to move to AK. And things were good.

But I needed a change and decided to move closer to my aging mom in NJ. But now, I'm kind of adrift.

Has this happened to you? And how did you get over it?

i realized quickly in life that goals were kinda empty. however, they are useful to keep you from going into the shitter-- that's where the real pain lives. avoid at all costs.

Originally Posted by knox

you don't. you just give yourself another silly goal.

exactly. knox is the new william blake, who wrote "the most sublime act is to set another before you." well, we're "post-modern" (pffft) and jaded but we still need this shit, right?

i'm currently working on various things that keep me sane. without them, i'd spend all day here writing crap.

[demonrail666]

Originally Posted by Lurker

Don't give yourself goals that can be fulfilled or that can be fulfilled in that definite way.

This.

I had a similar thing a few years ago and decided to get over it by learning the guitar. There's no moment while learning the guitar where it's 'finished'. It's an ongoing thing, which I really like.

[!@#$%!]

Originally Posted by demonrail666

This.

I had a similar thing a few years ago and decided to get over it by learning the guitar. There's no moment while learning the guitar where it's 'finished'. It's an ongoing thing, which I really like.

that's provided you like it. every time i've tried the guitar it gets fucking tedious at some point. maybe i don't progress fast enough, maybe i'm not interested, maybe my fingers hurt. but it needs something you enjoy doing--

for this, then, you don't actually need goals, because the enjoyment is in the present moment, in the process and not the goal-- which negates your corroboration of lurker's statement.

me, i like arguing pointless shit-- hence, goal-setting was not required by me to post this crap. see?

[artsygrrl]

Originally Posted by knox

you don't. you just give yourself another silly goal.

Oh, ok. misunderstood this at first glance.

[demonrail666]

Originally Posted by !@#$%!

that's provided you like it. every time i've tried the guitar it gets fucking tedious at some point. maybe i don't progress fast enough, maybe i'm not interested, maybe my fingers hurt. but it needs something you enjoy doing--

for this, then, you don't actually need goals, because the enjoyment is in the present moment, in the process and not the goal-- which negates your corroboration of lurker's statement.

me, i like arguing pointless shit-- hence, goal-setting was not required by me to post this crap. see?

Of course. I wasn't suggesting anyone actually take up the guitar, just that it represents the kind of goal that doesn't have a definite end point.

As for it lacking goals altogether, I have to disagree. Learning something like the guitar tends to entail a series of ongoing goals that can be met but only for them to be replaced by another, even more challenging series of goals.

Yes, the enjoymant of the process 'in the moment' is crucial but I needed a sense of progress, however slow and minimal, to really encourage me to continue.

[!@#$%!]

Originally Posted by demonrail666

...

As for it lacking goals altogether, I have to disagree. Learning something like the guitar tends to entail a series of ongoing goals that can be met but only for them to be replaced by another, even more challenging series of goals.

Yes, the enjoymant of the process 'in the moment' is crucial but I needed a sense of progress, however slow and minimal, to really encourage me to continue.

yes, i thought of this as i typed my answer but i kept from refuting myself to emphasize the point that in the case of the guitar, for you, while goals are useful, it's the process itself that is the reward.

i supposed i was trying to distinguish from being motivated by pure goals and being motivated by pleasure, which creates its own goals as it moves along.

it's a subtle distinction but a good one, considering how many of us have pursued stupid worthless "goals" that have no reward except for the getting it over with.

anyway, enjoy your guitarra-- magical realist that you are, i'm sure that butterflies come out of the strings as you play, and they go out to crash against windshields of those double-decker buses you people have.

me, i'm a glutton, i like cooking, both the process (creative chaos) and the goal (eating!).

but anyway i should stop mumbling and go do what i need to do today.

[static-harmony]

Originally Posted by akprodr

I watched 'Man on Wire' last night. The guy spent a good deal of his life thinking about and then planning and finally executing his stunt to wire-walk between the WTC towers. And then what?

I just realized that is essentially my current problem.

After I graduated college, I decided I wanted to ride my bicycle across the US. After I did that, I kinda got depressed. So I found a tour between MT and AK. Then I decided to move to AK. And things were good.

But I needed a change and decided to move closer to my aging mom in NJ. But now, I'm kind of adrift.

Has this happened to you? And how did you get over it?

That's how I feel everyday, but I just go on trying yo live life to the fullest extend.

[knox]

Originally Posted by Rob Instigator

all suffering stems from desire - Buddha

you must suffer a lot, considering your picture posting.

[Rob Instigator]

I don't think biking across the USA is a "silly goal" though.

[SpectralJulianIsNotDead]

Yes, just set more goals before yourself. Otherwise you might as well not get out of bed.

[EVOLghost]

surviving everyday is a goal...

[Lurker]

Originally Posted by !@#$%!

yes, i thought of this as i typed my answer but i kept from refuting myself to emphasize the point that in the case of the guitar, for you, while goals are useful, it's the process itself that is the reward.

i supposed i was trying to distinguish from being motivated by pure goals and being motivated by pleasure, which creates its own goals as it moves along.

it's a subtle distinction but a good one, considering how many of us have pursued stupid worthless "goals" that have no reward except for the getting it over with.

anyway, enjoy your guitarra-- magical realist that you are, i'm sure that butterflies come out of the strings as you play, and they go out to crash against windshields of those double-decker buses you people have.

me, i'm a glutton, i like cooking, both the process (creative chaos) and the goal (eating!).

but anyway i should stop mumbling and go do what i need to do today.

But you only enjoy the process because of the goal. You've only come to enjoy cooking because you like food. But as with you not liking the process of learning the guitar, well just because you want the goal doesn't mean you will necessarily enjoy the process to reach that goal.

And with guitar to play you need to practise, but if you've reached at least some level of skill then to practise is playing anyway.

So I don't think there is any pure enjoyment in processes.

[SONIC GAIL]

All your dreams can come true
All my dreams came true
But now...I have a bunch of other Dreams



The youth can answer all of your questions.



I say, you have to have goals. Then you will reach them and feel a sense of satisfaction. Then boredom sinks in. So set another goal. It is an unending circle of self fullfillment. An idle mind is the Devil's playground, they say. Thinking too much and not doing leaves the mind tired and bored.

There is no point to anything. In the big picture we are here to simply survive